When a Mom Doesn’t Think She Measures Up

June Cleaver

Recently I had a friend ask me what I thought about the statement,

“Every mother’s middle name is guilt.”

I considered it for a couple of days – even mentioned it to a couple of women and was interested in their responses. “Oh, boy, isn’t that the truth!” was pretty much what I heard from others.

Why is it that those of us that are mothers deal with guilt? As our children grow up and we look back on their training years in our home, we feel inadequate. We wish we had done more. We know ourselves and remember that we got angry too quickly sometimes. We were often too busy to play. We fear we were too hard, or not strict enough. We compare ourselves to “Leave it to Beaver” mothers and feel like we’ve missed the mark, though we gave it 110% for 20+ years of our lives.

But according to the Word of God, what should our response be when we look over our shoulder at motherhood days gone-by? We must view it the same way we do any other area of our lives – we must realize that all of our sinful responses are under the blood of Christ. It was covered at Calvary.

If I’m thinking on what is true and real, then I know that I did the best at the time, though it was tainted with my sinful nature. There is nothing that I can do now to change the past.

I will also remind myself that I serve a sovereign God who is still able to move in the heart of my child(ren), spite my failures and mistakes. He can take my feeble attempts at parenting and be glorified in the lives of my children. That is nothing short of a miracle, and it is all of His grace!
Satan is the accuser of the brethren, and it is he who would try to make me wallow in the mire of guilt. My precious Savior would not do that to His child. Guilt is Satan’s tool to defeat me, and I must fight it using God’s tool – His Word.

We also need to stop playing the comparison game. Comparison is a losing game – if we fall short of what we see in someone else, we feel guilty.  If we come out ahead we are proud.  Both are wrong responses that come from a wrong action.  Let’s put away the measuring stick and just do what we know God is leading us to do as we obey His Word.

So Moms, take heart – serve the Lord in your home to the best of your ability and in His strength, then let go of it. Believe the truth about your mothering skills, which is, Heb. 13:20,21

“Now the God of peace, that brought again from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great shepherd of the sheep, through the blood of the everlasting covenant, Make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is well pleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen.
Because of grace,

4 thoughts on “When a Mom Doesn’t Think She Measures Up

  1. Great post with lots of wisdom. When you know that you did the very best you could, guilt has no place to live because nobody can do better than their best.


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