Biblical Womanhood · Mentoring

If Your Thoughts Are All Over the Map

Adorned Study 8

One spring day in my East Tennessee backyard, I took my grandsons out on our acre of property, with both excitement and kites in tow!  We were going to fly their new kites for the first time!  They were ecstatic!  It had been many years since I had done this and I wondered if I could remember how to get this piece of plastic and string soaring into the air!  

I held it up with the current, let out a little string and watched the kite lift for a minute, and then it began to jerk, bob and then take a dive downward where it crashed to the ground.  I tried it all again, this time letting out more string so the wind could carry it upward.  It soared.  I handed the string over to my grandson.  As he held it in his small hands, the string began to unwind further and further until it was totally unwound.  The kite had lifted to the its full extent and was happily steady and flying smoothly!  It stayed up there until we were ready to go inside!

Just a couple weeks after that fun event, I went through some typical struggles that all women experience in life.  I was walking and praying one morning and the Lord brought to my mind the picture of that kite when it was bobbing and crashing to the ground.  As my emotions engaged, this is  exactly what I had allowed my mind to do. Rather than them being tethered to the string of truth, my thoughts were all over the place.

We’re all tempted to fall into that same kind of reaction when the winds of adversity blow or when a storm is descending upon us.  But I’m thankful to know and learn that we don’t have to bob and crash! There is hope for us and we find it in God’s Word. 

As we have been going through the Book, Adorned, we’ve learned through the study of Titus 2 that we are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers, under control of our desires, teachers of sound doctrine.  We’re to be using our lives to teach younger women.  None of this can happen if we are out of control, if our lives reflect someone who looks like my out of control kite – happy one minute, depressed the next.  Content and peaceful one day, screaming at God and everyone around us the next. 

Titus 2 goes on to instruct us…

The older women likewise, that they be in behavior as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things,
that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,5 to be discreet,

In many modern translations, “be discreet” is translated, “self-controlled or sensible.” The Greek word is Sophron. It comes from two other Greek words – soos, meaning either sound or saved and phorn meaning outlook or mind. When we put the two together, it means to have a “sound mind.” 

In chapter 3 of this study we learned about sophron – and we referenced it keeping us in control so we can be modeling for a younger woman a godly life, controlled by the Spirit of God. Sophron means “to be able to put on the brakes.”  We are led by the Spirit to stop our words – to stop our attitude, to stop our wrong response. We put on the brakes.

Nancy says that a sophron lifestyle begins with a sophron state of mind – a way of thinking that affects everything about the way we live.  We are what we think, so a sensile, sound, self-controlled mindset will result with a a sensible, sound, self-controlled life.

God’s Word is so practical for our everyday lives and this word shows us how to live out this sophron life – We must ask ourselves moment by moment, Is my thinking sophron?  Were my words sophron?  Is my response sophron?

There’s a spillover from not thinking sophron – our responses and appetites will lend themselves to excesses and addiction, as we talked about in the last lesson of this book.  

How do we acquire this kind of sound thinking?  Do we will it to happen?  Titus 2:11-12 For the grace of God that bringeth salvation hath appeared to all men,

12 Teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly, in this present world;

Remember my kite story?  I had to let the wind have control over the kite.  This is a beautiful picture of God’s Spirit controlling us when we just surrender to the Christ who lives in us.  The Christ in us will always respond correctly. 

Surrender – let Him have complete control. Be a woman with a sophron lifestyle – sound thinking that will control you, your thoughts and your responses.  Your testimony as a godly woman will soar!

What do you struggle with most in regards to reining in your thoughts? You can go here to listen to the podcast on this chapter.

9 thoughts on “If Your Thoughts Are All Over the Map

  1. Thank you for this! Just today I had to start counting my blessings and all the good things God has given when my heart and mind were feeling sad and discouraged about a current situation. Titus 2:11-12 will get written down to meditate on!


    1. Good for you, Stephanie! Rejoicing in the Lord is sure more encouraging than focusing on the discouragements, isn’t it?! This will be a great passage to pour over this week! =)


  2. Thank you for sharing this Ms. Denise. A real encouragement to me!! I am one that my thoughts run wild. Especially as I have gotten older. I struggle sooooo much with worry and anxiety about all the “what if’s” or “this could happen”. Not to mention if something does happen, I just go to pieces. If I could just remember that God is in control of everything and I must “bring into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ”. It is truly a battle in my mind.
    Thanks again!


    1. I think we’re all so prone to let our thoughts get the best of us, Michelle, but God’s Word has the prescription. I pray that your thinking will be “sophron” instead of worried, and that the Lord will bring His Truth to your mind as soon as your heart gets anxious. We can trust Him, can’t we?
      Thanks for letting me know this was helpful!


      1. Thank you for your prayers for me Mrs. Denise and reminding me that I need His truth and I can trust Him, not me, but Him! I sure need prayer! I am having a very difficult time right now with thoughts and my relationships and have been for a good while. So I appreciate your prayers MUCH! Thanks again for your continued encouragement in your writing and sharing!

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Thank you for this!! It was a very timely reminder for me. I have read that book twice and this chapter is my favorite. She has a pdf of sophron thinking on her website and I downloaded it and put it in my prayer notebook to pray through confessing and thinking on what I need to change.

    Your blog is such a blessing. Have you done a post on time management? I don’t know how you do everything you do. Most days, I feel like I am barely holding it all together! HA!


    1. Thank you so much for sharing the PDF! I love that part in the chapter! It is really poignant! I’m glad you were able to read this review when you needed it. I have also read the book a couple of times and each time I go over it it is so helpful and convicting!
      Thank you for your encouragement regarding my blog! I do have several posts on time management, but honestly it’s just trying to recognize the Lord’s direction at every step, each day and each hour and with each task. To God be the glory!


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