Discipleship · Marriage · Mentoring

An Unexpected Blessing

Adorned lesson #12

We had just left a social gathering and were driving home when my husband said to me, “So many women will not let their husband lead.” He didn’t mention what/who he was referencing, but just the observation he had made while we were at this gathering of people.

I let my mind think back to our recent gathering and
I heard a wife answering for her husband. 
I heard another one talking over top of her man. 
Was it that the men didn’t know what to say, or was it that he wasn’t given the chance to say it?  I’m pretty sure the latter is the answer.

I know how easy it is to do both of those things! If I don’t use the brakes of self control! What is required in these situations is a word that causes most women great distress. The word is submission. The definition of this word that I love is, To lean your husband’s direction. But what does God’s Word say about this word?

Titus 2:4 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

5 To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

Nancy Wolgemuth says,

To our finite, fallen minds, the whole idea sound unfair, even preposterous.  The wisdom of God, however, is infinitely higher than human wisdom. If we only could grasp His eternal purposes, we would be enthralled with the perfection and splendor of His ways. So when it comes to this topic, we need to earnestly seek His wisdom rather than relying on our own limited, flawed perspectives.

Let me briefly share seven things that submission is not…

  1. A wife’s submission to her husband is not submission to men in general.
  2. Submission does not subject a wife to a life of forced compliance.
  3. Submission does not amount to slavish, subservience. 
  4. Submission does not minimize a wife into mindlessness.
  5. Submission does not mean the husband is always right.
  6. Submission never requires a wife to follow her husband into sin.
  7. Submission never gives a husband license to abuse his wife.

Look at the beauty in true, biblical submission:

When a woman denies the natural urge to resent her husband or retaliate against him, when she runs to the cross instead of running her mouth, when she maintains a gentle and quiet spirit and steadfastly hopes in God, regardless of her husband’s behavior – that is no spineless, mousy, whimpering puddle of dominated femininity.  That is a woman of power. ~Nancy

Are you a Woman of that kind of power? Remember that our Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ submitted to the will of His Father, so when we submit to our husband, we are adorning the beauty of the Gospel. It was a love so great that Jesus was willing to lay down His own life to obey the will of the Father.

Wives, when we submit in this way, our homes will operate the way God planned. That means there is only one head, instead of a two-headed monster. Then the unexpected blessing is that we portray Calvary love!

Is it easy? No because we have an old sin nature. Then how can we do this?
In the power of the Holy Spirit. Yield to Him. Give the Lord the grievance or disagreement in your heart towards your husband. Let the Lord deal with him. You just love him. How will you show your love?

By submitting. Then watch the unexpected blessing that will come!

What is your question regarding submission? Leave them here, please!

Here’s another perspective on submission. If your marriage seems hopeless, I pray this post will encourage you.

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