Category: Christian love

Christian love · friends

Put Some Hope In Others!

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My husband went through a month-long series on Sunday nights of this past month entitled, “Be a Hope Put’er In’er and Not a Hope Take’r Out’er.”  All his messages were to put hope in marriages.  It was so practical and good!

As I went through my week after those messages, I thought about others who need hope. Everyone is going through something difficult from time to time.

We all deal with:

  • Illness
  • Personal trials in relationships
  • Financial struggles
  • Heartaches
  • Dealing with others’ sin that affects them
  • Death
  • Current events

So how can we put hope in and not take it out of folks?

You know how you pull up to the gas station and insert the nozzle into your car and then pump in the gas?  That’s how we should be spilling into others’ lives and giving them hope!  Pull the trigger and pour it in!

One of my favorite verses in Scripture is Romans 15:4

For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope.

What a good Father we have, Who gave us the Scriptures so that we could live lives that are hope-filled!  We look in and we find promises that we can claim.  We read psalms and we are comforted.  We learn of people in the Bible like, Job, David, Jeremiah and Peter who went through hardships and we are encouraged by their lives and victories.  Jesus is all through the Bible, and we remember that He came to live, die and rise again to give us the best kind of Hope!

So when we bump into others who are going through a difficulty of small or immense proportions, how can we put hope into them?

  •  I think the best answer is pretty clear – give them God’s Word.  Any hope I can give is temporal  – but God’s Word will be lasting and it will give hope that meets the soul’s need.
    I’ve found that giving my human input, my stories of similar trials, my humanistic opinion, are empty and can even be hurtful. When I don’t know what to say, I can open the Scriptures with promises that will be just the balm that will instill the hope that is necessary.  I do that for my own heart, and I must learn to do the same for others.
  • After the Scripture is given, and you pray with that person, touch them.  Put your hand on their arm, or around their shoulders.  Human touch  is comforting.
  • Look for a need that they might have.
    •  A meal
    • A load of laundry done
    • A caregiver for their child for a couple hours so they can nap
    • A gift card for coffee
    • A change of scenery.  Invite them out!

Let’s be on the lookout this week for times when we can pump Hope into others, rather than draining it out of them!

Maybe you’re one who needs some hope today. Let me remind you that God sees.  God is bigger than your trial.  He is at work even when you can’t see it.  Keep your eyes upward at a God Who is your hope!

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Christian Life · Christian love

Good Gracious – How To Develop a Gracious Spirit

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A woman had been standing in a long line at a busy grocery store. An over-worked cashier rushed in to open another check-out line and totally overlooked this woman, but instead pointed to another customer who had just walked up and said,”Sir, if you’ll come over here I’ll check your groceries for you.” How did the first woman respond?  She simply shrugged her shoulders and continued to wait.  She was gracious.

My husband, a huge fan of keeping up with the news, went out early several days in a row to find NO PAPER in the newspaper box. He wasn’t  too happy, so what did he do?  He called the office to calmly explain he wasn’t receiving a paper.  He learned that a new carrier was now delivering to our house.  She said,
“Sorry this has been a problem! You’re a paying customer  and you deserve to get a paper.” “Oh, it’s totally fine.”He responded, “The truth is, I don’t deserve anything but hell. It’s all of God’s grace and it’s totally fine.”  What kind of response was that?  Gracious.

A teacher at church was in a hurry to get things prepared for her Wednesday night class.  In the last precious moments, a child came skipping into the room to give her a hug and “chat.”  The teacher stopped, as though she had all the time in the world and gave that child her complete attention.  How very gracious she was!

Graciousness is a trait that seems to be slipping by the wayside. It seems everywhere we see people that are demanding their “rights.”   Here’s what it means to be gracious –

Gracious – pleasantly kind, benevolent, and courteous.

It’s times that you can’t really can’t prepare for that require us to show graciousness.  You cannot anticipate the situation, but it requires a pleasantly kind response.  If you can’t prepare for it, how can you be sure you’ll respond in a gracious manner?  You realize and understand every day that you don’t deserve anything.  Our society shouts otherwise, but it’s not true. Because we’re all sinners, our sin deserves hell, but Christ paid the penalty, and it’s by His grace that when we trust in Him, we are saved from eternity without Him! We’re promised heaven and a relationship with the God of the universe!  That salvation, and everything after that is an unbelievable gift of His grace. As we walk under the control of the Holy Spirit, we can be gracious, as we witness in the life of Christ at every moment of His life, and even in His death.

I wonder if it would even be helpful for us to look at that situation that we think should have had a different outcome, and mentally, and maybe even verbally, say,

I don’t deserve ____________!
(the next place in line, a newspaper, time alone…)

Graciousness is developed with a keen sense of gratitude for what we do have.

You and I can respond graciously even at times like these…

  • At a restaurant, even though my steak wasn’t cooked exactly the way I wanted.  Respond graciously
  • Another birthday, even though no one remembered to send a card. Respond graciously
  • A few minutes in a hot bath, even though a child is knocking on the door the entire time. Respond graciously
  • A trip,
  • a cup of coffee,
  • a spouse,
  • a child,
  • a computer,
  • a bag of groceries,
  • a day of vacation,
  • a home,
  • a dishwasher,
  • a job,
  • a friend,
  • a church…

you add the “even though’s” and then add “respond graciously.”

Let’s live a gracious life – one that realizes that everything we have, are, enjoy, get to do or experience, are all grace gifts that are going to be touched with something that will require us to respond with a kind, courteous spirit.  You’ll be a blessing to be near, just like my examples above.

Have you witnessed graciousness? I’d love to hear about it!  And if you leave a response, I’ll promise to respond graciously.  =)

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Christian love · friends

Spend It All On Others

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I am married to a man who has taught me so much about building relationships with people.  He’s always on the lookout for how he can make someone else’s life better, sweeter, or closer to God.  He does that with me, he does it with his friends, and he does that with strangers.  When you spend time with someone who has a large heart, the time goes so quickly.  They welcome you into their life.  They look you in the eye.  When you speak, they listen with their ears and their heart.

When I recently read Paul’s letter to the Corinthians, it is obvious that he also had a magnanimous heart towards others.  Here’s what he said about his time spent with these people:  II Corinthians 12:15 –

And I will very gladly spend and be spent for you…

In other words, I will gladly spend whatever is needed for you.  That would include:

  • Time
  • Money
  • Energy
  • Effort
  • Thought
  • Preparation
  • Resources
  • My very life

Think about those with whom you’ll be spending time with today – your mate, your children, lost co-workers, a friend.  Will you GLADLY spend yourself for them?  What would that look like if you did? When you’re with them will you be “spent” when you are together?  Will you allow yourself to be so connected that you’re “spending” while you’re listening?  Will you let your heart love them so deeply that you’ll gladly give whatever it is they need – your full attention, time to pray for them, or even something tangible?

Selfish people really don’t know the blessing they’re missing when they are only concerned about their needs.  Let’s be like Paul today and determine to “be spent” with the kind of love that sent our Savior to the cross. He paid the ultimate sacrifice for His friends, giving us the premium example.

Spend for others today and watch for the blessing that will come to your own life!

With love,

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Christian Life · Christian love

Consider Their Bonds

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Making critical assumptions comes all too easily for me.

I see.

I assume.

I criticize.

Over and over the Lord makes me aware that I’ve done it…again.  How thankful I am for grace that forgives, but when will I Iearn???

Recently I heard about someone who wouldn’t be participating in something awesome. Immediately my mind began making its ascent up Mount Critical, stopping to take mental photographs along the way. The next day I was in another conversation and someone else casually mentioned the same person (the one I’d criticized) and a need in their life.  My heart ached for them – then the Holy Spirit brought to my mind that this was the reason they weren’t able to participate!  They were suffering in a way that I had no idea!  Instead of criticizing them, I should have automatically assumed there was a reason, rather than assuming they were slacking!

This morning in my Bible reading I came across a simple phrase that Paul said to the Colossians –

Remember my bonds.

Paul was suffering for the Gospel’s sake.  He was patiently enduring while he was imprisoned.  What would it do for the Colossians if they would remember Paul’s bonds?  The same thing it does for me when I wisely consider another person’s trials, known or unknown:

  • It would make us compassionate
  • It would drive us to pray for that person
  • It would keep our heart tender
  • It would keep us from criticism
  • It would cause us to be understanding and magnanimous

We don’t always know what’s going on in another person’s life.  If truth be known, I’m sure we usually don’t know what others are dealing with.  We all have trials and would appreciate others being thoughtful of them, right?  Perhaps like me, you need to be reminded of Paul’s bonds, and those of the people that you live with, live next door to, work with, or those with whom you attend church.

Less criticism, more mindful of their bonds

that’s my new motto!

What does “Remember my bonds” say to you?

Refresh others by your loving consideration,

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Christian love

Do You Despise Your Mother?!

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Sarcastic, disrespectful children – it’s a bit shocking to hear, isn’t it?  Ugly words get hurled, like mud balls on the playground creating much more disaster than a load of laundry.  But who are the children?  Who are their parents? I’m not referring to teens and their 40-somethings mom and dad.  I’m talking about grown adults who are hurling the words and attitudes at their elderly parents.

Perhaps it started when the parents got sick and needed special help from their children.  Maybe it began when one of the parents died, leaving just one – alone, struggling, hurting and needy. It cuts into the world and time of a busy adult already struggling with other issues of their own children, marriage and jobs.  This creates pressures and sometimes also causes wrong responses and attitudes towards the people we love and should care for the most.

Our loving God, who knows what happens in families, put a Scripture in Proverbs to remind us to guard our hearts, and to treat our aging parents with love, respect and care.

Why would a child have the temptation to “despise their mother when she is old?”  She may:

  • Be in pain and be “short” with her responses
  • Be low in finances and be very frugal, to the point that you’d be tempted to shake your head
  • Be worried about health issues and be discouraged
  • Be lonely and need your company more often
  • Be sick and need your care
  • Be forgetful and need your helpful reminders of things, appointments, places and belongings
  • Be hard of hearing and need you to repeat yourself more than once

All of the above mentioned reasons could very well test a person’s patience, but let’s face it, when we were young children at her feet, did we not test her patience?  Did she not give us extra attention when we needed it? Why then would we despise her for her needs?

It’s no mistake that the Lord, the Giver of our parents, placed this Scripture in His Word because He knew there would be a temptation for some to “despise” their mom at a time when she may need her children’s understanding and love the most.  Don’t allow the changes that have come to your parents in their latter years to build resentment towards them.  Love them they way that you would want to be treated.  After all, you will indeed reap what you sow.

Lovingly,

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