THE look. Every mother has one. Perhaps the eyebrows are raised and her head shakes slowly. Maybe she squints her eyes and purses her lips. Or maybe her foot is tapped and she looks expectantly. Every mother’s look is different, but one thing is certain – every child knows his mother’s look! I’m not talking about looking like the Wicked Witch of the West, but a loving, yet firm face that says you mean business.
That look can speak at a time when words can’t be spoken – like at church. When a child is misbehaving, simply looking down the pew and giving THE look tells them all you would say with words. When you’re in someone’s home and your child is beginning to say or do something unkind or rude, it takes placing your hand on their arm and looking at them for them to know they need to stop what they’re doing right now. When you’re engaged in conversation at the grocery store and your child is interrupting you, turning and giving them a look should stop the behavior.
What is behind THE look? It is time at home teaching. Talk to your child while you’re preparing dinner together about how to behave in church, about the invitation you have to have dinner at The Smith’s house next week and how to be kind while there. Tell them about your trip to the grocery store or the mall and how you expect them to behave while there. Teaching them and talking to them beforehand will prepare the way for what you expect of them in each of those scenarios. If they “kick out of the traces” a simple look will say, “Remember what we talked about at home?” A slight shake of the head will say,”That is not acceptable.” Then, when you get home you can reinforce THE look by reviewing the teaching. “Did you remember not to beg and whine for a treat when we were at the grocery store? I looked at you while I was paying because you were disobeying what I’d asked you to do. What will you do the next time we go?”
Many kinds of misbehavior can be taken care of beforehand by another means – preparation on your part. If you’re going to the grocery store, why not take some Goldfish Crackers in a ziplock bag and let your child eat those while you get your groceries? Take a bag of toys and/or books in the car with you only to be looked at when at appointments. Get some felt books at the Bible book store only to be played with during church services. Make up some car games and toys to keep them busy while traveling.
Parental teaching is key to how our children will respond to situations. Talking to them and preparing beforehand won’t stop all misbehavior, but it will certainly help! Things will be so sweet you know what you’ll find yourself saying? There’s no place like home!
See you in church!
With love,
RefreshHer 