You can listen to this post on Refresh Her podcast.
(This transcript/post was last week’s episode)
Has someone’s words ever cut you to the quick? Words are a powerful thing. They can help in such a great way, but they can also destroy.
Have you ever seen the illustration of a tube of toothpaste and how it illustrates our speech?
If we take the toothpaste and just squeeze it out onto the counter, we see that it’s easy to get the toothpaste out of the tube. But now if we try to take that same toothpaste and put it back inside the tube, it’s impossible. That is such a great illustration of what our words are like. Once they’re out, there’s no retracking them. There’s no taking them back.
Our words are a depiction of what is in our heart. They tell who we really are. When we open the scriptures, God’s Word has so much to say about our words. Let’s specifically zero in on a woman’s words and at both the negative and the positive side of Proverbs chapter 7 and “the strange woman,” and the power of her words.
What does she say?
How does she use her words to snare a man?
Say unto wisdom, thou art my sister, and call understanding thy kinswoman, that they may keep thee from the strange woman, from the stranger which flatters with her words.
The first thing that we see about the strange woman here in Proverbs 7 is
- She uses flattery. What is flattery? It is what you would say to someone’s face that you would never say behind their back. You would say it to their face because you want something from them. It’s defined as excessive and insincere praise. It’s given to further one’s own interest.
This woman has an interest in bringing this man down to an immoral affair and she’s using flattery to do so. These are words that should never be given to anyone.
Psalm 5 verse 9 says, There is no faithfulness in the enemy’s mouth. Their inward part is very wickedness. Their throat is an open sepulcher, and they flatter with their tongue. The enemy
Proverbs 26, 28 – A lying tongue hates those it crushes, and a flattering mouth works ruined.
Flattery destroys other people, and that is certainly what the strange woman is going to do. We should be using words that are uplifting to our husband; words of admiration, polite expressions of praise, praising him for his physique, his abilities, his character, his work ethic, his godliness. We must be genuine in what we’re saying.
What other kind of speech does this woman use?
In the twilight, in the evening, in the black and dark night, there met him a woman with the attire of a harlot and subtle of heart. She is loud and stubborn, and her feet abide not in her house. Now is she without, now in the streets, and lieth in wait at every corner.
2. She uses loud Speech. She is not a gracious woman in her dress, in her speech, or in her volume. Why is she being loud?
Proverbs 9, 14 and 15 She sits at the door of her house on a seat in the heights of the city, calling to those who pass by, who make their path straight.
I think she’s being loud because she’s calling out to these simple men who would be passing her way. Matthew Henry says –
She is talkative, she’s self-willed, she’s noisy and troublesome, she’s willful and headstrong. She is all-tongue, and she will have her say right or wrong. She is impatient and out of control, she cannot bear to be counseled, much less be reproved by husband or parents, ministers or friends.
We hear her voice being loud. It’s over every other voice in the crowd.
You don’t have to be an adulterous woman to use loud words. Let’s think about times that we would use words that would be at a loud volume.
A woman who is angry,
A woman who is jealous,
A woman who is envious.
Proverbs 15 reminds says that a soft answer turns away wrath. This refers to the kind of words we use, but also the volume of the words that we use. There is more power in a soft word than a shouting accusation.
The instruction we glean for our speech from Proverbs 7 is that we need to refrain from using flattery, and we also need to watch the tone and volume of our voice.
Our words are so powerful, especially in our home, where nobody else may be listening or hearing. We need to use words so that God is glorified in the things that come out of our mouth. Remember that toothpaste can’t go into the tube again, and our words cannot be retracted, either. Let’s use them wisely to powerfully build up, rather than destroy!
Which is most difficult for you to refrain from – flattery or volume? Commit your words to the Lord today. Through His Spirit we can speak wisely!
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