Yesterday’s post was about turning your marriage from “Simple” to “Elegant.” Read here if you missed it. To freshen up your Friday, make plans now for a change you’re going to make or a plan you’re going to implement this next week to take a simple, routine task to the max and turn it into elegance!
Ephesians 5:33 commands wives to show respect to their husband. So another avenue that will definitely freshen up your marriage is to obey that verse. I want to challenge you to find one thing for which you respect your husband. Think about who he is as a man, the work he does, the leadership roles he carries, the responsibilities he fulfills. Pick one of those things and plan to tell him about it face to face. Use the words, “I respect you for…” I could say, “Dale, I respect you for your love for souls. You are always on the lookout for someone with whom you can share the Gospel. That is such a blessing to me!”
Don’t do it for a response or a reward or a dinner out – do it “as unto the Lord.” Do it because you love Christ and want to be obedient to Him. If a positive response follows ~ enjoy! But don’t expect one. Again, just do it because you want to do what is right ~ because you want to add a little refreshment into your marriage!
By the way, why DO you respect your husband! Stay refreshed!
Is there a married couple that you watch and admire? I have had my eye on a couple…for a very long time. They have been fun to watch because their marriage is what I would call an “Elegant Marriage.” It’s not because they eat with gold-plated silverware or live in a mansion. It’s the relationship and they way they respond to each other that makes their marriage elegant.
What is an elegant marriage, anyway? Jon Franklin said,
Simplicity carried to an extreme becomes elegance.
Therefore, if you take any normal activity you’d do and “carry it to the extreme,” it makes it elegant. For a husband and a wife that would include ~
A “glamorous” picnic
Having dinner ~ Carried to an extreme~ Sitting at the table, candles, or centerpiece, music playing, plates served up nicely.
Talking ~ Carried to an extreme ~ Making a special sitting area in your bedroom, front porch, or backyard where the just the two of you (no children sitting between you) sit and talk, take cups off coffee with you, snuggle.
Sleeping ~ Carried to an extreme ~ Make your bedroom a refuge, rather than the work place, Wear something pretty rather than comfortable. Make sure your sheets are soft, blankets aren’t pilled and pillows are fluffy. Make the bed inviting. Read a book together before turning the lights out. Give a back rub. Play soothing music. Cuddle. Hold hands and pray before sleeping.
Going on a picnic ~ Carried to an extreme ~ Take a pretty tablecloth and a centerpiece. Make homemade soup and place in Mason jars, homemade cookies and a thermos of milk or coffee. Play Pandora music on your phone. Sit on the same side of the table.
Think about the simple things that you do each day – errands you run together, chores you share, car rides, etc. Pray about how you can take it to the extreme to turn your marriage into elegance! It will add the sparkle to your relationship that might be lacking!
Oh, and the couple I’ve watched who have an elegant marriage? It’s my parents – married close to 60 years, and they still do things to make their relationship special! What a blessed heritage I have!
Nest~ing. verb (used without object) ~ to build or have a nest.
My definition? The art of making a house a home.
It’s all the rearranging of furniture, pictures and decor so the room calls you in. It’s the addition of pillows and throws and footstools to make your guests comfortable. It’s a candle burning just to make the kitchen cozy and a lamp lit – not for reading, but for atmosphere. It’s what women do because God made us nesters.
I’ve recently been stuck on adding decorative touches to my powder room ~ the half bath that our guests use. Because it’s small, I didn’t want to add anything to the walls that is too bulky, for fear it would be in the way. I searched and searched before deciding on going with a bird theme in there. I found the Vinyl Wall Decor at Hobby Lobby on half price. Rather than using words, I found a tree branch and birds. Perfect! It went with the theme and it was flat!
I used two mirrors I already had and painted them gray and yellow to go with the decor. Then after looking for a picture that fit the style of the room and was a bird themed, I hung this picture. Though it may seem a little small, I’m happy with it because of what’s hanging on the other walls. It seems enough…at least for now.
As noted on the picture, I had received that adorable note card from a sweet friend. I loved it so much that I knew I was going to keep it and do something special with it. Then I found the frame at TJ Maax and put a piece of burlap behind it. Talk about low budget decorating!!! There it is.
I have a wreath hanging on the bathroom door so I can point guests to the correct “room” by saying, it’s the door down the hall with the wreath hanging on it.
I like how the mirrors reflect the wreath. I had one more little bird from the vinyl decor and decided he needed to “perch”on top of the mirror.
So, my “nesting” in this room is complete (for the moment!). It makes my heart smile to do the what’s needed to make a room feel complete. Now, I’m off to another room!
I’m not sure if there’s anything that touches our hearts more than a child’s death. It doesn’t matter if they die as an infant or an adult child; if they die before their parents, it’s gut-wrenching. In recent days, I’ve had a couple of dear families whom I love who are going through this heart breaking experience and it’s causing me to reminisce about the sorrow a parent endures when their child dies.
I understand a bit of that sorrow, after the stillbirth of our second daughter, Ashley twenty-seven years ago. I can’t think of a time that I’ve experienced grief so deeply as at that time. I remember seeing people laugh and go about life so “normally” and I wondered how they could be jovial when my heart was breaking so desperately. It was from that deep pit of sorrow that I began to search the Scriptures myself for comfort from God’s Word. What hope could I have in the midst of all this sorrow? Would I ever be happy again?
On the day of her funeral, I remember standing at the bathroom sink curling my hair in preparation for this dreaded day. I had my Bible on the sink in front of me and I was still searching out of the emptiness of my heart for something to salve this wound. The Lord directed my eyes to Psalm 73:25, 26 –
Whom have I in heaven but thee? and there is none upon earth that I desire beside thee.
My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever.
This described me perfectly. I only desired the Lord and His comfort. My flesh had failed, and now my heart was following closely behind. But I was encouraged as the Lord reminded me that He would be my strength for this day. This day of walking behind a tiny white casket. This day of putting my little baby girl in the cold, dark ground. This day of walking away and leaving her there in that cemetery.
Then tomorrow when I awoke, He would be my portion for the grace for that day, too. I’d find grace to put my feet on the ground and live, grace to love my husband, and grace to care for my three year-old daughter. My life moved on in those gray days and I ran over and over again to that passage of Scripture to find what I needed for the next difficult moment – going to church, seeing a new baby at the store, answering the questions by my daughter about her baby sister, and also listening to people’s responses to Ashley’s death.
Out of my searching the Scriptures, I learned some wonderful truths. Here is Truth from God’s Word that will comfort parents during their time of sorrow unlike anything else:
Your infant is in heaven. II Samuel 12;23 – But now he is dead, wherefore should I fast? can I bring him back again? I shall go to him, but he shall not return to me. David is speaking in reference to his baby son that died. David had received understanding that though the child had died, he would go to him – he would join him in heaven some day. Any child or person who dies before they have the mental abilities to understand salvation will, by grace go to heaven – this is God’s mercy.
Your child is a living soul in heaven. No person (baby or adult) will be an angel when they go to heaven. I Cor. 13:12 – For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. How is a person known? By the way they look. We will recognize one another as we did here on earth. Why does it comfort people to think a baby is another angel that God needed? He has all the angels He needs. People are people and angels are angels. There’s really no comfort in telling someone their child is an angel, but understanding that they are a person alive with Christ brings great joy!
Your child is perfect and is rejoicing now. Revelation 21:4 And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.
You can be with them One Day! Rom. 10:13 For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved. I Thess 4:14-18 For if we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so them also which sleep in Jesus will God bring with him. For this we say unto you by the word of the Lord, that we which are alive and remain unto the coming of the Lord shall not prevent them which are asleep. For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first: Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.
Everything you need to be comforted and encouraged is written to you in God’s Word.Romans 15:4For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope. Don’t look for God to speak to you through a meteor shower and think that’s your child’s way of telling you they’re happy. God doesn’t speak to us that way. He gave us His Word to tell us everything we need to know. Dig into it. Even if you can only concentrate on one verse during your sorrow, cling to it, memorize it and believe it!
If you’re wondering how you can comfort your friend or family member during their time of loss, let me tell you about the person who comforted me best when Ashley died. It was my dad – a man of few words. I’ll never forget him arriving at my house and entering my bedroom where I was standing. He hugged me and wept with me and said nothing. His tears were enough communication of his heart for me and for his granddaughter. Sometimes crying with the person says more than all the speeches we could conjure up. Just love the grieving parents and make your words few. Talk to the Lord about their pain rather than talking to them. They need to lean in and listen to God’s voice and comforts right now. If they ask you questions, just point them to the Word of God so they’ll hear only Him speaking.
I trust this will help you to know how to encourage parents who are grieving. It’s a painful process, but they’re not alone if they know the God of all comfort. He will speak Words to them that you and I could never match. Point them to The Word. Psalm 119:50 This is my comfort in my affliction: for thy word hath quickened me.
What did we do for dinner before Pinterest? I’ll tell you ~ we scoured through a dozen cookbooks to find a recipe for Pork Chops for which we had all the ingredients. A half hour later, we found something we could use. Now, within a matter of minutes we have a recipe at our fingertips (and about ten more we want to try) just by doing a search on Pinterest!
Such was the case for me last week. I had purchased a couple of lovely Pork Chops on sale at Ingles for $3! I love cooking chops on the grill and I wanted to do more than just add barbecue sauce. I found a delightfully delicious and easy recipe for Grilled Maple Dijon Pork Chops. The marinade was perfect and caused a luscious charring on the meat. I let the chops marinate for a couple of hours, then I also brushed it over the meat while it was grilling.
I had to add apples as a side to the chops. I always hear Peter Brady saying, “Pork chops and applesauce!” Yeah, that was my era. Scary. But it does go well with it, so I say it in his voice, then do it!
1/4 cup grainy Dijon mustard 1/4 cup maple syrup 2 tablespoons brown sugar 2 chopped garlic cloves 1 chopped shallot 1 teaspoon each salt, pepper, and thyme drizzle of light oil (this just helps them to not stick on the grill)
Toss the pork chops in the marinade to coat and put them in the fridge for about 45 minutes-hour.
Place on a med. high grill. Turn half way through cooking. I cooked mine until the temperature was about 135 degrees. Then I put them on a platter and covered it with foil. They will continue to cook, while remaining juicy. Let rest ten minutes.
Thanks for the inspiration, Pinterest and Peter Brady! Hope you’ll try these – they’re swell! =)
RefreshHer 