Comparison Kills

Growing up as an identical twin, comparisons were as inevitable and as sure as the sunrise. Anyone that didn’t know my sister and me well would line us up side by side and look at one and then the other. “She’s a little taller. Oh, She has a mole under her left eye. Her face is fuller (never what any girl wants to hear!). Her eyes are rounder.” On and on it went until they could find a feature that would allow them to “tell us apart.”

Unfortunately, however, most females don’t just compare themselves to their sisters for the sake of identification. It continues through the years as a part of our very worth. In the teen years, we compare ourselves to our peers, where we wish “our hair was straight like ______’s, or curly like _____’s”. We also wish we had more of a personality like the popular girl in the youth group or at school. Then we grow up and compare ourselves to other women. Her weight, marital status, number of children, spiritual gifts and talents, career, and fashion are all put on the scales of comparison and leave us most times feeling like we just don’t measure up.

The result of comparison is never good. If we come out on the “short end of the stick,” we feel worthless. If we come out ahead, we deal with pride. So what is a woman to do? We must do the thing that is necessary any time we want to know the truth – Look into God’s Word!

Being 4’9′ made me always feel inferior. I’d compare myself to my tall friends and wish my life away that I was their height. Then when I heard a message on Psalm 139 in my early 20’s, the Lord finally brought me to the place to accept everything about the way the Lord made me.

I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made:
marvellous are thy works;
and that my soul knoweth right well.

I was no mistake, no funny joke to the Lord. He designed me this size, and His creation is not bizarre or wrong, no matter if others would laugh or tease. How could I look into the face of my God who created me “fearfully, wonderfully, and marvelously” and tell Him He made a mistake when He planned my height?

Height is trivial. But then so is…

  • Your nose
  • Your teeth
  • Your body build
  • Your hair type
  • Your number of talents

The issue is, will we use what we have for God’s glory? He used

  • Small statured Zacchaeus
  • Young David
  • Paul with his thorn
  • Left-handed Ehud
  • Tempestuous Peter
  • Doubtful Thomas

What do you wish you could change about yourself? If it’s part of God’s design, learn to accept it and determine to be useful for the Lord’s honor. Comparing yourself to others will result in death – death of your usefulness, death of your spirit. You are just the way God purposed. Instead of living with comparison that kills, enjoy spiritual life that invigorates!

P.S. And do twins a favor and don’t line them up for your comparison. Let them be the individuals God designed them to be. In time you’ll learn who’s who as you get to know their personality. (I was the ornery one!)


2 thoughts on “Comparison Kills

  1. Denise, I had to laugh at the fuller face comment. My daughter was friends with identical twins when she was a young child. She always knew Misty from Rachel and vice versa.When I asked her how she told them apart, she replied that Rachel had a fuller face. Well I never learned to tell them apart. I had two sets of identical twins over my years of teaching preschool and I could NEVER tell them apart so I resorted to calling them Sister!! Both sets were girls….One sweet mom would dress Sally in Pink and Tess in purple to help me out but Julia and Georgia remained Sister all year in class.lol. So I feel your pain at comparison but you are right we all do it! I am 5’7′ and was tall back in the 60s when I was growing up and every one commented on how tall I was….I hated it. Now that I am 60 I am embracing the person I am and it is very freeing.


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