What Would You Give Up Just To Have Peace In Your Home?

February 23, 2022February 22, 2022 RefreshHerLeave a comment

As a woman who loves to bake, I can tell you that there’s nothing more disheartening than baking up a new bread recipe then cutting a slice after it’s cooled only to find that it’s dry!

Ugh.

It’s frustrating to go to all that trouble only to have dry morsels fill your mouth like so many tumbleweeds in the desert. But did you know that God’s Word tells us that there is a time when dry bread can be a good thing?!

Proverbs 17: 1 says
Better is a dry morsel with quietness,
Than a house full of feasting with strife.

There is nothing appealing about a dry morsel to our taste buds, but God’s Word says the blessing of quietness and peace is so great, that it makes a dry morsel more desirable than moist bread, dipped in Olive oil!

This passage is saying that peace in the home is beyond all other material blessings. A home full of feasting is wonderful, until that home is full of strife. Have you experienced how hard it is to take a bite of anything when there’s strife and contention around the table? We all have.

If peace is so desirable, then what keeps us from having it? Why isn’t it permeating from our family relationships as it should?

There can be other causes, but ladies, God’s Word gives us several pictures in Proverbs that point the finger of strife in our direction. It’s a hard picture to look at because it’s very telling. This is convicting to my own selfish heart. Listen to ways we can destroy the peace…

A foolish son is his father’s ruin, and a quarrelsome wife is like a constant dripping. Prov. 19:13

It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house. Prov. 21:9

Prov. 25:24 It is better to live on a corner of the roof than to share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Prov. 15:16, 17 Better is little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure with turmoil.

Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, Than a fatted calf with hatred.

Listen to what is being traded in so that apeace can be found –

Strife
Quarrels
turmoil
brawling
hatred

What would a person take so they could enjoy quietness at home?

a corner of the housetop
a corner of the roof
just a little material goods
a dinner of herbs
a dry morsel

Love sweetens dry morsels
~Matthew Henry

If you’re realizing that there is little peace in your home, recognize that if you are a child of God, you have the Prince of Peace living in you! The Christ in you should permeate each relationship, allowing His peace to rule.

Ask the Lord if you’ve contributed to the strife by being contentious and quarrelsome. Be still and let His Spirit speak to you. Then humble yourself and make it right before God and also your family. Invite them to come in off the rooftop, and serve up some dry morsels, slathered with love. Peace will return.

P.S. It’s better for your pride to be hurt than your family destroyed.

Lovingly,

home · Marriage

Family Friday- Your Husband is Worth It!

February 3, 2017February 2, 2017 RefreshHer7 Comments

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When I read in Scripture about some of the men having multiple wives, my heart cringes. I can’t even imagine the rivalry between “tender-eyed” Leah and lovely Rachel, sisters who both married Jacob. There’s enough right there for all kinds of trouble, right?!

But let’s set all that aside and look at one thing – Jacob noticed that Rachel was beautiful. He had eyes to see that she was lovely. Men are visual. Period. That is how God made them. When your husband chose you, he liked – no, he loved what he saw! What did he see? Think back to your introduction, or the time when his heart began to be drawn to you. How did you look to him?

I remember when my husband and I began to date seriously, he would come visit his parents for the weekend, which also happened to be the city where I lived and worked. Before he left very early on Sunday morning to head back to school, I would get up and get ready for church- shower, hair fixed, and dressed for the service. I wanted to look my best so he’d remember me that way in the weeks we were apart! Now obviously, since we’ve been married, he’s seen me LOTS of mornings before makeup and hair and he loves me. But I would be foolish to remain the plain, unkempt look for the rest of the day! After I add a bit of makeup and curl my very straight hair, it might not improve much, but it’s better than when I started, and my husband notices! Why do I do it? Because my husband is worth it!

I can get a bit weary of the girls on Instagram or blog world who say,

“Here’s my Momiform. This is just the way it is, folks!”

The caption is under a picture of her with leggings and a baggy t-shirt, hair pulled back in a pony tail and no makeup. Her message is that life is just too busy, too demanding to do anything else but pull this on and live in it until it’s time for bed.

No one has to be outfitted in finery, or look like a model, but putting on a pair of comfy jeans or pants, a top with some form, a pair of earrings, and five minutes at hair and at least some mascara and lip gloss, would not only make her husband smile, like Jacob looking at Rachel, but would probably also make her feel more energetic and ready for a day of demands before her! Seriously, getting ready for the day – even if you only have 30 minutes, will make you feel more like some body and doing something! Why do we do it? Because our husband is worth it!

Show your husband that he is worth it by gussying up a bit each day before he comes home. Wear something he loves to see you wear. Put on a necklace or scarf with those jeans. Add a little blush, mascara and lip gloss. Stop making excuses and just do it. Our husband sees all kinds of women every day that did take the time to look their best…we should too. Our marriage is worth it!

Is this a difficult assignment? I Corinthians 13 reminds us not to “seek our own.” If you were going to put his needs and desires before yours, how would that change your attitude even about your appearance?

Refresh your marriage,

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Husband · Marriage

Marital Deposits

October 7, 2015November 3, 2015 RefreshHer2 Comments

WHILE waiting in line at the bank, a man developed a very loud case of hiccups. By the time he reached the teller’s window, the hiccups seemed to have worsened. The teller took the man’s check and proceeded to run a computer verification of his account. After a minute she looked up from her terminal with a frown and said that she would be unable to cash his check.”Why not?” the man asked incredulously.”I’m sorry, sir,” she replied, ” but our computer indicates that you do not have sufficient funds to cover this amount. As a matter of fact,” she continued, “our records show your account overdrawn in excess of $5000.””It can’t be!” he cried. “You have to be kidding!” “Yes, I am,” she answered with a smile, counting out his cash. “But you will notice that your hiccups are gone.”

Most of us know the sinking feeling when there weren’t sufficient funds in the bank to cover our withdrawals. It makes for a rough day, doesn’t it?

While we are ever so careful to guard our bank account from being over drawn, I wonder what the records would show on the monthly statement of our marriage? How many withdrawals have you made? Wives need love, affection, attention, compliments, encouragement, dates, pampering, help around the house, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on… Each one of those represent a withdrawal from our marriage account. Now, think back on this past week – what kind of deposits have you made? Not the monetary kind – but the relational kind.

Have you shown respect for your husband with your words?
Have you elevated him in front of others?
Have you thanked him for being a provider for your family?
Have you done a thoughtful gesture for him? (Bought his favorite candy bar, written him a note, made his favorite meal, took him out on a special date or created one at home- you get the idea)
Have you spent time doing something he enjoys even though it might not be your favorite activity?
Have you done something to lighten his load?

These things (and many others) are ways we make deposits into our marriage. There’s a double blessing here – we’re meeting the needs of our husband and rediscovering what a joy it is to be married. It’s fun! It is God’s plan and He can only do what is good!

Take a thorough check into your “account” and make sure you’re not overdrawn! If it’s been a while since you’ve put something into your marriage, you might surprise your husband so much you’ll scare his hiccups away!

How have you made deposits into your marriage this week?

Lovingly,