“Your children are made in the image of God.
When you are yelling at them, you need to
understand that you are yelling at God.”
These words were spoken by the mentor who taught our recent Apples of Gold lesson on “Loving your children.” The truth touched the heart of one of the women, I know, and I’m sure others were struck at the seriousness of this understated action, this
We rationalize it. A mother might say to herself, “Yelling at our children out of frustration is a natural response, right? Doesn’t every mother yell at her children?” But where does it come from? It comes from our sinful, selfish hearts. We yell because the children aren’t doing what we told them to do, or they’re not doing it fast enough, or just like we wanted.
So we yell.
The yelling doesn’t make the situation better, nor does it make the child feel better. And though we might feel better at the moment after releasing our frustration, we feel pretty low once “the moment” has passed.
Perhaps if we could picture ourselves standing in front of our God instead of our child, finger extended, face reddened, body leaning forward slightly, and our voices lifted to Him saying exactly what we just voiced to our child, we would stop before we speak. Perhaps then we would bow and pray and ask for His help, His grace, His tone, His attitude – all that He uses when He speaks to us.
- He never raises His voice.
- He whispers.
- He loves.
- He teaches.
Angry disciplinarians produce angry children.
We do need to correct our children when they don’t obey or don’t do what they are told, but we need to do it with kind tones. We need to discipline our children, but it must be couched in love.
Stop and listen to yourself when you’re talking to your children today. How about hitting “record” on the voice recorder on your phone while you’re talking with your child during a frustrating period? When you play it back, you’ll quickly find out if your tone reflects the way God deals with His children. Listen with honest ears, then if it’s less than loving, proceed with God’s grace to make the changes necessary.
Are you yelling at God? Ask Him for forgiveness and then ask for His help. He will answer you…but it will be in a whisper.