Biblical Womanhood · femininity · Godly Character Traits · Mentoring

Safeguarding Your Purity

Lesson *9 in Adorned, by Nancy Wolgemuth

We use locks, safes, fences, banks, and fresh, new passwords to keep our valuables secure. But what do we do to keep our purity secure?   Have we given it as much thought? Do we set up protective measures so that it won’t be stolen? 

As we have been making our way through this Titus 2, I see these verses having a waterfall effect. 
The top of the fall is the instruction to teach the younger women.
Then each subject is addressed and one just trickles right into the next one. 

In the previous study, we talked about being discreet. The word we used was sophron – from the Greek  meaning sound mind.  It’s thinking that is solid and based on the Word of God.  The overflow of that kind of thinking leads us to our next characteristic – Discreet or pure.

Titus 2:5 That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, To be discreet (sophron), chaste – pure. One commentator says,

Pure” refers primarily to moral purity, and, especially in this context, to sexual purity and marital faithfulness. Christian women as young wives are “to adorn themselves with proper clothing, modestly and discreetly,

As older women, remember that we are modeling before the younger women each of these characteristics.  As we teach them, we are giving them someone to walk through the journey of godly womanhood with them. 

We must also understand that this life of purity involves more than preserving our marriage and sexual purity. This touches every area of our lives –

  • What we thinkPhil 4:8
  • `What we look atPs. 101:3 I will set no wicked thing before mine eyes: 
  • `What we sayProv 4:24 Put away from thee a froward mouth, and perverse lips put far from thee.

Scripture tells us why we should be pure. I mean, what’s the big deal, anyway?

Titus 1:15-16 Unto the pure all things are pure: but unto them that are defiled and unbelieving is nothing pure; but even their mind and conscience is defiled.They profess that they know God; but in works they deny him, being abominable, and disobedient, and unto every good work reprobate.

Nancy Wolgemuth admonishes…
Unbelievers are slaves to their passions and lusts. Our world is full of this kind of living. It’s everywhere we look.Because it’s so prevalent, it’s easy to lose our shame of it.  It’s easy to be casual about it, rather than being concerned.  We’re used to it. If we’re not careful, we become desensitized to coarse language in books and movies, we overlook sinful conduct on television that we would never invite into our homes.  What has happened is that we’ve opened the vault door of our purity and let thieves come in to take whatever they want.  We can’t think that allowing this to go unguarded won’t have an affect on us.

If this concerns you, her book listed five practical ways that we can “safeguard” our purity. I’ll list them without any explanation here but if you want the details you can listen to the podcast I recorded on this chapter here.

  1. Choose discretion
  2. Value modesty
  3. Check your emotional attachments
  4. Guard your electronic communications
  5. Lean on your trusted female friendships

As a pastor’s wife, I can’t tell you how many times we’ve had people sit on our living room sofa  and weep and say through their sobs, “I so regret what I’ve done. If only I had made a different choice!”
BUT I’ve never heard anyone ever say, “I so regret staying pure!” Never.
You won’t regret it, either.  Not only will you have the joy and peace that purity brings, you will have a testimony to share to a younger woman and a watching world. 

Guard your purity – so much is at stake.

Ask yourself which of the five safeguards you need to put into practice.

Refresh your purity by making it safe.

Biblical Womanhood · femininity · womanhood

Be More Than Just Modest

One morning I listened to Revive our Hearts broadcast on the subject matter of modesty. As I picked up my grocery list and purse and headed out the door to the store later that day, the thoughts from the program were still on my mind.

Not long after I entered the store I looked up an aisle and saw an employee, but I wasn’t sure – “was it a woman?” My thoughts bantered: “No, it’s a man. No. It’s a woman. Yes. That’s right – I think.”

About 15 minutes later I was in another part of the store when I came upon a customer pushing a young child in the cart. “Is that the mother or the father?” I truly could not tell until I passed them in the aisle and could see her skin, and then heard the child say “mommy.”

As I walked away from these women, I thought about the things I’d heard addressed from the broadcast. Modesty issues need to be addressed in our society today – it’s sorely lacking, even among Christian women. However, I began to think about the need to also be sure that along with dressing modestly, that we are also characterizing femininity.

What thoughts come to your mind when you read that? Lace? High heels? Dresses? Ruffles? Of course those things are indeed all feminine, but I believe we can have on a pair of jeans and a blouse and still be feminine. Wearing jewelry that is distinctively for a woman, having hair that is soft and cut in a woman’s style, and wearing clothes and shoes that are unquestionably feminine are all ways we can be sure we are dressing in a way that would set us apart as a woman.

We can also display femininity in our actions, speech, and walk. I’ll never forget a habit I picked up when I was a 5Th grader. I had a male teacher who, as he walked, would bounce off the balls of his feet. One day I was at home and my mom said, “Denise, you’re walking like Mr. Heft! Don’t do that!” I’m sure it must have been hilarious, but it was also not ladylike! The fact that we are women should be evident in all aspects of our lives. I’m not suggesting that we go overboard and walk with a swing in our hips that would rate a 5.0 on the Richterscale, but there is a difference between walking like a man or walking like a woman!

“What’s the big deal?” you might ask. In Genesis 2 we read that in the Garden of Eden, God made man, then He made woman. They were distinctly different, made with different purposes and they were even made with different substances; Adam was formed from the dust of the ground and Eve was made from the rib of Adam. I believe it honors the Lord, our Creator, to celebrate our femininity by being feminine, dressing femininely, and acting feminine. That’s how He made us and it is good.

My challenge is for us to look carefully at ourselves and be sure that we’re characteristic of a godly, feminine woman.