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Using Mother’s Day as a Measuring Stick

I have a question for you moms.  Are you ready?

How was your Mother’s Day?

If you can rejoice and share about the gifts, cards, flowers, meal and attention lavished on you, I rejoice with you.  I also encourage you to lift your eyes to heaven and thank the Lord for this grace gift.

You see, for many Mother’s Day is yet another day to be forgotten.  It’s another special day that should have been recognized, but it is overlooked, like it was last year, and the year before that.

The truth is that we really put too much stock in Mother’s Day.  I’m afraid for many it has become our measuring stick.  Moms line themselves up next to the day and  measure themselves by the response they get from their husband and children.  If they’re forgotten, then they’re a bad mom.  If their picture is posted on social media with praise in the caption, they feel a greater measure of success. “She’s the best mother a husband could want for his children” or “She is always patient and kind” make us over the top happy.

For years I put so much stock in Mother’s Day that when my husband failed to recognize my sacrifice and service to our family, it not only ruined my day (and theirs!), but it destroyed my confidence that I was even a woman fit to be a mother!  Pretty sad.

Then one sad Mother’s day years ago, when I was reading my Bible and brooding, the Lord sweetly reminded me that my expectation was not to come from my family, but from Him alone.

It may seem “only right” that a family would express appreciation to mom, but that is our expectation.  It may seem “only right” that we could have the day off, but that is our expectation.  We could continue to list other things we expect, like gifts, praise, or attention, but all each one of those things does is to imprison those with whom we live!  Each one is its own prison bar, capturing our “prisoners.” (our family).

My soul, wait thou only upon God,

for my expectation is from Him.

Psalm 62:5

When I let the Lord be my expectation, I will never be disappointed.   I need instead to look into His lovely face and ask the question, “How am I doing, as a mom, Lord?”  When He gives His gentle approval or rebuke, we will know that it is given rightly.  He always judges correctly.

We also need to remember that Proverbs 31:25 reminds us that the virtuous woman will rejoice in time to come.  Our praise will come at another time.  It might not be until we see the Lord in heaven, but there will be a day for rejoicing.  It will come because we’ve been faithful to the task of motherhood, and it will be given by the One Who gave us the privilege to be called, “Mom.”

 Don’t give up, moms!  Keep your eyes on the finish line –  the Bema!

So, if last Sunday was a bummer day for you, drop to your knees and get your approval from the One who loves you unconditionally and knows you better than any husband or child ever could.  One Day it will be worth it all and you will be rejoicing as never before!

With love,

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7 thoughts on “Using Mother’s Day as a Measuring Stick

  1. I had a great Mother’s Day as I welcomed my sixth grandchild, Audrey Katherine! But my husband and children have always been very good about honoring me on that day. My birthday is a week later so sometimes I get a gift for the two occassions but that is fine with me. One year my husband did get into trouble as he was out in California on business near Mother’s Day and my birthday. So I got See’s Candy for Mother’s Day. That was fine as it is a fancy candy that you can only get in Cali. Then a week later on birthday he gave me box two!! He never did that again.lol. We laugh about it now. I always get a Mother’s Day gift for my daughter and DILs to show them how much I appreciate their mothering of my grands. Expectations often led to disappointment and I have fallen into that trap over the years. Your post is a good reminder for all of us.

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    1. Congratulations on the new granddaughter! What a delight that must be! Oh, we LOVE See’s Candies. We stopped in their store while in CA last summer. We brought some home to our neighbors who were watching our kitty in our absence. So glad you had a special Mother’s Day!

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  2. Thank you for writing this post, and thank you for being transparent. I admit that I needed to read this. When being a wife and mom is right up there at the top of your list of priorities, you want recognition for that because it’s part of your identity. As I get older, and one of my expectations is not met, I have to remind myself that my Lord meets all of my needs. If I truly needed whatever I expected–whether praise or gifts or time, etc.–God would give it to me. And in those times, I am reminded that it is good for me to not have all of my expectations met, b/c in those times I see in my reaction the need for continued growth and trust in the Lord. There is so much in this post that spoke to my heart–thank you!

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