Sometimes all it takes is a simple request to repeat what I just said to my husband that will do it. I make a statement, he doesn’t hear and he says,
“What did you say?”
So, out it comes again, only this time it has a razor-sharp edge to it that would make Floyd the barber flinch!
Do I think he purposefully cannot hear me? Do I really believe his diagnosis of hearing loss was an intentional plan just to get under my skin?
How ridiculous, yet, sadly, that’s occasionally how I respond!
Why is it often easier to be really kind to people we barely even know than to our spouse? He’s the one to whom we pledged to love until death, yet we kill him with our sarcastic responses, glaring looks and deathly silences.
There are kinder, nice ways of saying something and there are words or tones of voice that I could use that would upset someone. Your husband is a person, too. There are kinder, nicer ways of communicating with him and there are ways of setting him off, just by your choice of words or tone of voice.
Today’s encouragement for your family, your marriage, is just this –
Be Kind.
- There are two ways to say something. Choose the kinder way.
- Show him even greater kindness than you would a friend who you love dearly.
- Smile at him.
- Forgive him.
- Listen.
- Look in his eyes when he speaks.
- Lend him a hand.
- Do a favor.
- Oh, and repeat yourself with the softest tone when he cannot hear you (said Denise to herself!)
Do you find yourself being kinder to others than you are your spouse? What will you do today to fix that?
RefreshHer 
“Someone” used to threaten to film me during the day so that I could see how I look when I talk or am annoyed. 🙂 Well, it actually happened. Sometimes when I am editing a video for YouTube, I see myself respond to Paul’s interruption (or even just a normal interaction during the video) and I’m horrified at how sharp I am! Seeing myself on camera really helps me learn what it sounds and looks like when I’m being unkind. It is NOT pretty.
LikeLike
I have experienced the same thing on film. I know what you mean about the “not-so pretty” thing!
LikeLike
Thank you for sharing your thoughts about kindness. As for this day, you hit me right between the eyes.:)
LikeLike
Conviction doesn’t feel good, until we repent. I’m right there with you! Thank the Lord for 1John 1:9!
LikeLike
Thank you for the reminder! Husbands and wives are included in the golden rule as well. 😀
Loftforum.wordpress.com
LikeLike
Yes, none escape God’s Word. I’m reminded also of Ephesians 4:32, Be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake hath forgiven you. Jesus left such an example for us to follow! Thanks for stopping by to read!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great reminder! I often have to repeat myself because my husband is focused on something else and I catch myself saying “I love talking to myself” and he doesn’t even hear that which make me more angry. I’ve been convicted many times that I need to speak words that encourage and respect my husband. I can’t do it in my own strength but I can with Christ’s help.
LikeLike
Amen! In Christ we find the willing and the doing! Philippians 2:13
LikeLike
You make a very good point ..we always treat each other wit respect. Makes for a happy life …lets face it men tune out of the wife’s voice and this is the range of hearing loss they get too !
LikeLike
God commands husbands to love their wives, and wives to respect their husbands. Respect is definitely the issue with repeating ourselves in a kind tone. 🙂
LikeLike
Thank you for this reminder. I know I’m guilty of sharp responses far too often and I know my response creates a domino of emotions at my house. If I respond in a kind way my family does the same. If not, then I’m the one starting the negativity.
LikeLike
You are so right; wives set the tone for the home! With the Lord’s help we can do what is right so that others can follow our example.
LikeLike
This really resonated with me, Denise. My hubby has hearing loss as well and I just hate having to repeat myself. I know that way too often I tend to answer sharply. The thought that occurred to me just now is that I should be so thankful he is there for me to repeat myself to. I’m sure there are many widows who would love the chance to repeat themselves to their husbands again.
Thanks for sharing this. It is so helpful to me to know this is something others are struggling with. And you shared some wonderful points as to how to show kindness!
LikeLike
Wow, your point is well taken! We won’t always have them. Thanks for that reminder.
LikeLike