I went through my refrigerator this weekend and did some tossing of some old things.  A couple slices of bread that weren’t exactly fresh, and some leftovers that were now a bit too leftover (eew! It happens).  No one wants to eat old food!

But what do we do with the “old things” in marriage?  By old things I mean the things we’re used to.  We’re used to him leaving for work; we’re used to him coming in each night.  We’re used to fixing supper for him, cleaning up after him, kissing him goodnight, seeing his face across from the table, sitting beside him in church…and so on.  It can be taken for granted.  It can get old if we’re not careful. Hence the encouragement for these Monday Marriage Matters posts.  Marriage really does matter; it’s the second most important relationship – the first being our relationship with the Lord.  So, why do we overlook it?  Why do we just endure?

Here’s a collage of my attempts to demonstrate my desire to keep our marriage fresh.  None of these will wow.  None will be the most unique demonstration of love in marriage, but you know what?  Each one does contribute to my marriage, in their small way, and that’s what this whole series is about.  It’s the little things, the little moments, the little thoughtful gestures that keep that something special  in a marriage.  It keeps it from getting old – moldy, if you will.

The top left is a screen shot of our texts.  My husband was meeting a friend for lunch and dropped me off on his way.  He stopped and bought me lunch because he didn’t want me to wait to eat until after he was finished.  As I sat there eating my grilled Chick-fil-A, I thought about how thoughtful that was of him, so I sent him a text to say “thank you for lunch!”  It would be easy to overlook those kinds of gestures, but staying in the habit of saying , “thank you” and “You’re welcome!”  keeps things fresh!

The next picture on top is a weekly “chore” I do for my husband.  I make him homemade granola.  He LOVES it, so I try to always have it on hand for his breakfast.  When I slide the pan into the oven I usually always call to him in his office, “I love you!”  His response is, “You’re making granola!”  Food can talk, can’t it?!

Sometimes a little reminder to leave a note is helpful – like this chalkboard.  We use this one frequently to say how much the other is loved!  “More than chocolate” says a lot! =)

The second picture collage shows planned date nights.  One was a blue grass concert that we attended together.  My husband saw that this super-good group was going to be in our area the next week and he made the plans and bought the tickets for us to attend.  I love it when he plans ahead and we can look forward to that time together!  Afterwards we stopped for a late night snack and had the best time just having a date night! The other date was dinner at home – our favorite place!

Lastly, is my stack of note cards specifically for your husband.  They have a phrase on each card with room to add a note.  I have put them in his Bible, at his desk or on his pillow when I’m going away.  He was gone for a couple nights this month to shepherd a sweet family in our church going through a difficult surgery.  I stuck a couple notes in his luggage to remind him I’d miss him while he was away. (I found these at Hobby Lobby)

It’s just the day to day maintenance that my refrigerator needs, but more than that, my marriage needs it so nothing strange ends up on our plates!  I’d rather serve fresh love than dry, moldy “I’m used to you” attitudes, how about you?!

What did you do yesterday to demonstrate to your mate that your marriage matters?

Refresh your marriage,

Marriage matters!  We talk about it a lot here on my blog.  It matters because it matters to our God!  If Christians don’t stand up and defend, first their own marriage, then the biblical view of marriage, then we have no right to complain when the state votes against it!

I love highlighting biblical marriages here.  I love showing what a healthy marriage should look like.  Note that I did not say a Perfect marriage, for none exist.  But if you and I value marriage as God does, then we need to be putting intentional thought into time with our spouse, intentional effort into respecting our husband with our words and actions, and intentional effort into keeping the love fresh and vibrant!

That’s why I’m encouraging my readers to Instagram pictures of ways they are showing Marriage matters to them.  There have been some great posts this month.  For whatever reason I’m not able to move those posts from Instagram to my blog, so I’ll share what I can visually, then tell you about a few highlights so you’ll have some great ideas of ways to make the most of your marriage!

• The picture below was from my friend, Angie.  She found a recipe for Super Bowl snacking that she was pretty sure her husband would love.  She said how much it meant to him that she would plan a special food just for him!
• Another friend made a coconut pudding for her husband that he loves, but she dislikes.  How thoughtful!
  Do you know what your husband loves?  Do you make an effort to please him – even if it’s something you might not enjoy?  That’s a rebuke to me, because it’s easier to make things I like, or that we both enjoy.  I need to do better at that!

•  Whitney shared about the importance of getting fixed up each day – even if it’s a day she and her husband are sharing together at home.  Putting on make-up and fixing her hair for him shows that he’s important to her!  It’s easy to be a little sloppy if we’re not going out, but what a message it gives if we look sharp just for our husband!  That is a great tip from a young wife!
• Another friend bought a special seasonal treat of Reese’s Peanut Butter cups in the form of an egg for her hubby.  What’s your husband’s favorite candy bar?  What does bringing home a treat while we’re out say to our husband?  “I was thinking of you in the middle of a busy day!”  This is a great way to show your priority of loving your husband over your children…bring him a treat in secret.  The children don’t have to have one every time you spoil him!
• My friend, Kellie, plays the piano for her church.  Her choice of an offertory was especially for her husband who loves the song, Victory in Jesus.  So in the middle of a church service, her piano playing was in essence, playing a melody of love to him!  It’s a little wink, a nod to him, saying, “I knew you would love to hear this song!”  How sweet!
• Something that my husband did for me last week was to send me a text (while we were both home!) to say, “I need someone to watch Fixer Upper with me.  How about sharing some popcorn, too?”  This is a show we both love to watch together, and it was fun to turn it into a special time as we dug into the popcorn bowl and laughed at all Chip’s antics together!
  

Again, whether or not you post your picture, I pray that these posts will remind you of the importance of being intentional (have I said that word enough today? Ha.) about pouring effort, love, words, and actions into your marriage.  It really does matter.

With love,