Marriage

A Peek Inside the Parsonage

I’m going to share a story with you today – it’s one of my favorites, because it’s about how my husband and I met and fell in love.  I’ve tried to look back to see if I’ve posted this before, and I couldn’t find it in the search engine. (After writing almost 800  posts, it’s hard to remember everything I’ve written about!) If I’ve already told you “my story” please pardon me, and then allow me to tell you again.  Sit back, friends; this is my version of Cinderella, sans the glass slipper.

It was 1979 and I had a scheduled interview for a secretarial position, as well as kindergarten teacher position at a Christian school in Sumter, SC.  I was seeking God’s will for my life, and this was the open door that I’d asked for.  I met in a conference room for the interview at the Christian university I attended with a Pastor Cunningham.  While we were discussing the ministry and the possibility of my working at his church and Christian school, his son, Dale, came up to speak with him.  We were introduced.  No fireworks, no stars in our eyes…you see he was dating someone and so was I. 

I got that job and was enjoying teaching the 5 year-olds.  The next year I was asked to teach first grade. The middle of that school year Christmas break was over and I started back into second semester.   I was busy with my life, and career, but not so happy with my dating situation.  After praying about it, I felt the Lord would have me end the relationship.  I did.  Relief came and I was anxious to move on.  The next day at school, while my children were lined up in the hall for restroom break, Dale walked in.  He still had a few more days of Christmas break before he would head back to the university to finish his junior year. We had built a friendship over the time I’d known him, but nothing more.  As we chatted there in the school hall, he shared with me that he’d called and broken up with his girlfriend the night before!  I shared with him that I’d done the same thing!  We laughed about it, then he candidly asked,

“Hey, would you like to go bowling tonight, just to have some fun?”
“Sure!” I agreed.

We did just that.  We were just friends going out to have a good time and forget the past.  He was so much fun to be with.  He treated me with respect and gentlemanly courtesy.  I was blown away with the thoughts I was having as I returned home from our date.  I wrote these words in my journal that night…”I’m not in love or anything, but I believe I just went out with the guy I’m going to marry!”

The next day was a Friday, so I had to teach.  That afternoon after I dismissed my children, I returned to my classroom only to find Dale sitting on the corner of my desk waiting for me.  Be still my heart!  What a lovely surprise. 

“Last night was so much fun.  Want to go out again?” he asked.

Of course I said “yes!”.  Again, we had a great time, just being ourselves and enjoying the freedom that brings.

The next day being Saturday, presented Dale with a dilemma about how he could see me.  I wasn’t in my classroom – I was in at my home where I lived with my roommate, Debby.  Should he be so bold as to come knock at the door? What if he wasn’t invited in?  However, it was his only option, so that’s exactly what he did.  I opened the door and said, “You’re just the man we were looking for!  Our vacuum won’t work!”  He suddenly became Mr. Hoover himself.  (Many months later he told me all it needed was a new belt, but it took him a really long time to simply replace that small part!).  Pretty sneaky!

After that weekend, Dale went back to school and we wrote letters, called, and made trips back and forth.  Our relationship survived one breakup – but because it was the Lord that had started it,  He saw to it that the wanderer returned!  =) We were married in 1981, following a year-long engagement.

God is so good.  He is faithful.  He knows what He is doing.  He knew that my interview would lead me to the one I was to marry.  He guided my footsteps until they crossed the paths of my future husband. I have told “my story” to my girls many times as they were growing up.  I wanted them to know that if they would “give the Lord half a chance” He would bring the right man into their lives. 

A single girl doesn’t need to finagle to get a guy.  She doesn’t have to throw herself in his path.  God will do the work.  All a girl needs to do is be a woman of honor and wait.  I’m happy to say that our oldest daughter has confirmed that God has brought “Prince Charming” to her.  They will celebrate their first anniversary next month! And after 30 years, I can say more than ever, I am blessed beyond measure with a husband that I could never have found.  He was God’s gift to me.  It hasn’t all been a storybook life, because we are both sinners, but I know this – Prince Charming has nothing on Dale Cunningham!

I know that there are many hurting marriages – Christian and non-Christian alike.  God is bigger than your troubles, and He is able to make your marriage wonderful.  Could I encourage you to listen to the series that is being played on Revive Our Hearts this week?  It’s the story of a couple whose marriage was beyond help, humanly speaking, but is wonderful today.  I pray their story will encourage you!

From inside my parsonage windows,

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Summing It Up

Let’s pretend that a poll is taken in the city or neighborhood in which you live.  The question asked each person who lives near you is, “What do you know of (place your name here)?”  What would the consensus be? 

She’s so…

  • Sweet!
  • Crabby!
  • Unpredictable.
  • Thoughtful.
  • like Christ.
  • negative!!!
  • godly.

Whether we realize it or not, people really do know what we’re like, and they could probably sum it up in one word.  In the sweet story of Ruth, we remember that Ruth, her mother-in-law, and sister-in-law had all lost their husbands.  Ruth’s love for her mother-in-law drives her to return to Bethlehem to be near Naomi,  and to be enabled to worship Naomi’s God. 

As Ruth gleans in the field of Boaz, he addresses her and tells her what people knew of her.  In Ruth 3:11 Boaz says, “all the city of my people doth know that thou art a virtuous woman.”  How did they know that?  Ruth hadn’t been in Bethlehem for very long.  Ruth 2 says,

Then said Boaz unto his servant that was set over the reapers, Whose damsel is this? And the servant that was set over the reapers answered and said, It is the Moabitish damsel that came back with Naomi out of the country of Moab: And she said, I pray you, let me glean and gather after the reapers among the sheaves: so she came, and hath continued even from the morning until now, that she tarried a little in the house. Then she fell on her face, and bowed herself to the ground, and said unto him, Why have I found grace in thine eyes, that thou shouldest take knowledge of me, seeing I am a stranger? And Boaz answered and said unto her, It hath fully been shewed me, all that thou hast done unto thy mother in law since the death of thine husband: and how thou hast left thy father and thy mother, and the land of thy nativity, and art come unto a people which thou knewest not heretofore.

  1. They saw how she treated others.  Ruth was the “new kid on the job” when she came to glean in the field.  She put others before herself and acted in humility.  Do you treat others with respect and preference?  Do you humble yourself to be taught by others who have more experience than you?
  2. They saw that we was a hard worker. She worked from morning until evening, “tarrying little in the house.”  She didn’t take long breaks.  She knew there was work to do, and she stayed after it in order to make the most of her day.  Are you thankful for the work you have to do, or do you complain about it?  I’m not just referring to your job outside of the home, but what about housework, laundry and meals?  Are your responsibilities taken care of with joy – or griping? If you do work outside the home, do you linger too long on break?  Do you come in late?  Do you take privileges you shouldn’t? 
  3. They saw how she treated Naomi. There was love, tenderness, kindness, thoughtfulness, and humility. Hmmm, a good lesson for all of us who have a mother-in-law. We married her son. She gave us a precious gift! Are we thoughtful of her? When was the last time you suggested that your husband take his mom out for breakfast or lunch? She’d love to have him all to herself for a little while.Even if she lives out of town, encourage him to call and just talk with her. Do you remember her birthday, because your husband probably wouldn’t? If she’s up in years, do you care for her needs as much as possible? Perhaps just treating her the way you would want your daughter-in-law to treat you will help you respond to her with a special kind of love.

There are so many wonderful lessons in the book of Ruth, but stopping to think about our own reputation could change the way we spend today.  Take a moment and consider the way you treat others, your work ethic, and the way you treat your mother-in-law.  What improvements do you need to ask the Lord to help you make today?  May all in the city know that we are virtuous women.

Written with love,

dessert

What’s Cookin’ in the Parsonage?

Church dinners make it really hard to know what to cook for Sunday dinner!  We have so many wonderful cooks in our church, and so many of the ladies bring their specialty dishes to each dinner.  Me?  I’m still on the lookout for something better than I’ve made in the past, and so I make a new recipe instead.  Crazy, I know.  That’s just me.

So, for the big dinner celebrating the 55th anniversary of our church, I made a new roll recipe, a new green bean casserole, a new rice dish, and a new dessert.  The rice dish was just okay…I need to tweak it a bit.  Every recipe can’t be a winner, right?  It is kind of embarrassing to take a failed dish to a church dinner, but hey, no one knows who brought it, so I guess I’m safe (or I was until I posted this on the Internet!)  However, the other things were worthy of sharing with you…especially the simple and chocolaty dessert, but first comes the healthy stuff!  =)

Who doesn’t love a pocketbook…especially when it comes in the form of bread?  I found this recipe in Southern Living…

Come closer…

The dough can be made up to 24 hours in advance, then rolled out the next day.  I love that!  That cuts down on your work time when it’s time to bake them.  These are a nice little roll, fluffy and yeast flavored.  An amateur bread maker could tackle this recipe easily.  They make about 4 dozen, so if you’re feeding a crowd for Thanksgiving, these would make plenty!

The Green Bean Casserole was also in the new issue of Southern Living.  It’s a lightened up version of the traditional green bean casserole.  Instead of using Cream of Mushroom soup, you make up a white sauce with a few surprise ingredients added.  It’s very good!  If you like the southern style green beans, I would suggest using canned French-style green beans instead of the fresh.  A topping of Panko bread crumbs and the French fried onions give a nice little crunch on top. 

Okay, you’ve read through the other recipes; it’s time to introduce you to the most simple and yummy Fudge Pie!  I’ve had the cookbook this recipe was in forever, and had never tried this until Saturday.  Wow.  This recipe will be my new go-to dessert when I need something made up very quickly!  It mixes up in one pan in under 5 minutes – I’m not kidding.  It bakes for 25 minutes.  I worried that I had over baked it, but the inside was nice and gooey – like fudge!  Yes, please. 

Fudge Pie

1 stick margarine
1 square chocolate or 1/4 C cocoa
1 C sugar
2 well-beaten eggs
1/2 C flour (heaping)
1 tsp vanilla
In saucepan melt margarine and chocolate.  Add remaining ingredients and pour mixture into greased pie pan.  Sprinkle with 1/2 C chopped nuts.  Bake at 325 for 25 minutes.  Easily frozen.
This would be good served warm with a scoop of ice cream, or Cool Whip, as pictured. 
You need to try this!  Seriously.
What’s been cooking in your kitchen, friends?  I’d love to hear.  Have you had any failures, like my rice?  Any successes?  Do tell.

From my parsonage kitchen,

Refreshment in marriage

Freshen Up Friday

I wonder how many weddings will take place tonight?  With a date like 11/11/11 you know lots of gals jumped at the chance to have that as their wedding date!  I mean, seriously, what husband could forget that anniversary?  =)

Why not do something special with these numbers today that will refresh your marriage? 

  • Eleven kisses at eleven o’clock
  • Eleven notes tucked around the house declaring your love and respect for your husband
  • Compare him to the Apollo 11
  • Make a list of 11 reasons why you couldn’t live without him!
  • Make an acrostic – Write out “Eleven” and use each letter to describe things you love about him

This may seem trite, but it’s the little things that we do each day that keep our marriages fun, bring in the unexpected, and make it better than it was yesterday!  Refresh your marriage eleven times over!

 If you come up with a clever idea, please tell us about it here on the Comments!

See you in church!

Be refreshed,

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The Gift of the Church

This Sunday my church, Boones Creek Bible Church, will be celebrating its 55th anniversary.  To God be the glory, great things He hath done!  While I was in Nova Scotia last weekend, I learned in a much greater way how very blessed I am to have my church.  I’ve always loved it and been thankful for it, but I learned that not everyone has a church like mine.

My church has two full-time pastors on its staff.  We own our own building and are completely out of debt.  Our Sunday services begin with Sunday school for ages 2 on up, with a well-staffed nursery for the younger ones.  Following Sunday school, we meet for worship, where a pianist, organist, orchestra and choir will accompany us as we sing, and will also participate in special music.  My pastor/husband will preach in the main auditorium after the little ones are dismissed to children’s church where workers will teach them the Word of God on their level of understanding.  After a powerful message from the Word, we will be dismissed for the morning and look forward to returning that night where we’ll hear another message from the Word. Tuesday nights offer the opportunity to CARE for others by means of a visit, phone call or card.  Wednesday night we come together for a time of testimonies, songs, and encouragement from the Bible.  The children will work on their lessons in Frontline Clubs and be taught  “how to love and live the Bible.”  Some of our men will gather on Thursday night to play basketball in our gymnasium.  This is for fellowship, exercises and evangelism.  Once a month, the ladies meet for Bible study and fellowship.  Often the Sunday school classes meet during the week for fun and fellowship.  If a person took advantage of every service opportunity, in a month’s time they could have met at the church at least 20 times to hear the Word and grow!

Many of the ladies that attended the ladies’ retreat in Nova Scotia came from very small churches.  There are not enough people to support a pastor full-time.  Sometimes that means a church will go without a pastor for long periods of time, while they’re praying for a man that is willing to come.  I heard of one church that closed its doors during the summer months because there would only be 2 or 3 gathering during the vacation season – not enough people to merit them meeting.  These ladies were so hungry for fellowship and the teaching of God’s Word.  They are very aware what a treasure these things are and they came with hungry hearts to hear and receive everything they could during those 24 hours together.

Do we really love our church like that, as well as the opportunities we have to meet together?  How easy it is to make excuses and stay home, or to let things that aren’t of equal significance to hinder us from meeting in God’s house when we need to be there!  Often, good pastors get discouraged because their own people, people who are God’s children, do not avail themselves to the rich blessing of their own home church.

Last Sunday night after arriving home from Nova Scotia late that afternoon, I walked in Boones Creek Bible Church with a much deeper appreciation for that which God has blessed us.  As I stand in our Anniversary service this Sunday and we sing, “To God Be the Glory,” I will be thinking of those little churches in Canada that long just to have a pastor and fellowship around the Word.  As I thank God for my church, I will be praying for theirs.

What do you love about your church?  Are you availing yourself to its ministries and faithfully attending?  If not, ask God to help you see what a gift it is, and get back into it this weekend!

With love,