Have you ever watched as someone you knew slipped away from the Lord? It’s usually a gradual thing. People don’t generally wake up one morning and decide they’re going to backslide. It happens over a period of time and through a series of events. Perhaps a person has a trial that comes into their life and they have a question as to why this would happen, but then they try to bring themselves back to the Truth of God’s Word and His love for them. However, their thoughts keep leading them to question the Lord, and the comments from others don’t help either. Christians and non-Christians alike wonder why God would allow this to happen to a “good person.”
Someone steps in – maybe it was you – and tries to give godly counsel. The person in the trial is guided to the promises in God’s Word that the Lord is trying to conform them to the likeness of His Son through this difficulty. By now, though, they are becoming cynical and they shake their head as as loving friend tries to lead them to right biblical thinking. They continue on a downward spiral, avoiding church and anyone who points them to God. The tendency for the one that has tried to lead them back to the right way is to say, “Fine, go your way. I hope you reap from what you’re sowing! I’m washing my hands of this.”
As I read I Samuel 15 today I was struck at how Samuel responded to hearing that Saul had not obeyed the Lord. It says in verse11 – “And it grieved Samuel; and he cried unto the Lord all night.” His heart was broken for Saul. Samuel had given Saul much instruction, but spite that Saul chose to go his own way and disobey the Lord’s commands. In verse 35 we read, “Samuel came no more to see Saul until the day of his death: nevertheless Samuel mourned for Saul…” Samuel wasn’t afraid to share the truth with Saul; a reminder, I believe, that we don’t just sit and watch someone sin and be afraid to tell them the truth in love. But we must remain broken over their sin. I believe that Samuel continued to pray for Saul, and even though he watched Saul slipping farther and farther, he loved him and desired that Saul make things right with the Lord.
If there’s someone you know that has drifted – perhaps even in a drastic way, ask the Lord to keep your heart soft towards them, as modeled by godly Samuel. May our hearts be as such as would mourn and cry to the Lord all night for a brother or sister that has wandered. Keep praying, keep lovingly sharing the truth when you have the opportunity. God desires that they return to Him, and it might be due to a Christian friend like you that they will do just that. Let’s be like Samuel.
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Tips for Getting Rid of Clutter
I’m not sure what it is about spring that inspires many to clean up and clear out the house and clutter, but it’s a good thing, isn’t it? I feel good about straightening up a closet or getting rid of unused items. The hard thing is that I have a husband who is a confessed pack rat! He keeps things because he has a sentimental heart and because he thinks he may need it again some day. Of course this runs cross-grain to a de-clutterer! The solution? Here are a few tips that I’ve found helpful:
- If the item in question was a gift but you don’t like it or use it consider passing it along to someone who would use it. Don’t re wrap it and disguise it as a new gift (tacky in my opinion) – just give it.
- If someone special gave you or made something for you that isn’t usable any more take a picture of it as a keepsake then throw it away.
- If you’re saving items your children made find just a couple of special things and put them into a special box for safekeeping.
- What about all the birthday cards and anniversary cards you’ve collected? I save just the special ones in a hatbox because I like to look back over them. You can also use many of the pictures and sentiment on cards as scrapbooking embellishments.
- Clothes that haven’t been worn in a year go out! You can send them to the consignment, Goodwill, or some store like that. I’ve found that adult clothing really doesn’t sell too well at yard sales. Children’s clothes sell – if you don’t mind getting rid of each item for a quarter after all the trouble of the yard sale. I’d personally rather pass things along to someone that can use them.
- Books can be donated to the library’s annual book sale. (The Gray Library is collecting books now.)
- Here’s a great way to get rid of sentimental notes and pictures: several years ago my mom gave me and each of my sisters a beautiful little box filled with cards, notes, and photos of things that each of our families had sent to her and my dad. It’s fun to read notes that my girls sent to their Nana and Papa after receiving birthday gifts, or cards that I wrote to them as a new bride. It cleared out her closet, and gave me a journal of sorts all in a pretty little box.
If you have tips on clearing out clutter please share them here.
Happy cleaning!
Married Life
Is there anything so sentimental, sweet or moving as a wedding? I always get choked up when the doors open and the bride, with a beaming face, eyes on her groom, enters the sanctuary. Last night I had the privilege of attending a wedding at our church. As I sat and listened to the ceremony I did what probably most married women do – I thought back to my own wedding all those years ago. How can a couple so young and in love have any idea of what they are to face in the years to come? I surely didn’t! Though this couple has had good counsel about the reality of married life, they still really don’t have a clue about the twists in the road that lie ahead. That doesn’t make marriage frightening; it brings us to the greater understanding of how much we need the Lord at work in our individual lives every day. It’s also a blessing to think that God gave us someone with whom we can share those difficulties.
As I observe couples that have been married longer than our 28 years, I see that married life doesn’t ever just get easy. I guess I had the thought that after living with and loving someone for years and years, it would almost come naturally. But loving others really cuts cross-grain to our selfish natures. The longer you’re with someone the more relaxed you become, and because of that, sometimes it’s easy to also let our own flesh rule in the marriage instead of loving our spouse as Christ does. Just as this newly married couple are guarding their manners, the way the listen to each other, the attention they pay to the other…so each of us that are married must continue to make our spouse our priority. Kindness, thoughtfulness, loving gestures, gracious speech, unselfishness, and having a magnanimous heart should be worked on, through the power of the Holy Spirit for all of our married lives.
Twists and turns in our lives are going to happen, but how much sweeter those things are when we can face them hand in hand with the mate God has given. Are you still working on your marriage? What have you done today to make your mate’s life sweeter? Remember the day you vowed before God to love that man all your life, then do something to demonstrate that today.
My Expectation
What a very special Mother’s Day weekend this was! On Saturday evening my family went to Flatrock, North Carolina to celebrate because of Sunday being a very full day. My husband had looked on-line for a special restaurant where we could enjoy not only a delicious meal, but also a beautiful setting. Wow, did he ever find the perfect place! We went to Seasons, and had a perfect evening together. We were tucked back in a wooded area with bushes, trees, flowers, pergolas with vines and frequently visited birdhouses. We were seated in a corner of the restaurant next to the windows where I could see all that I just described.
The meal, oh the meal! It was a three course dinner, very gourmet-ish and just as tasty as it was beautiful. The table was set perfectly with white linens and fresh flowers, beautiful silverware and stemware. It was one of those places that is not so formal that you feel uncomfortable, but it was beautiful enough that it made you feel very special!
Just before our dessert came the Mother’s Day gifts were distributed along with cards that touched my heart (what mother feels deserving of all this attention? Not me…I know me, sinful wretch that I am!). Nonetheless, the gifts were perfect too because my girls know my tastes – pink and brown purse, silk scarf, chocolate with raspberry…you get the idea. After I opened my daughter’s gifts my husband made a little speech about the special occasion that brought us to this delightful place – Mother’s Day. He went on to add that it was also his desire to honor me after twenty years of homeschooling our girls that will come to an end this Friday when Allison finishes her senior year. He then pulled out a little box with a jewelry gift for me – a complete surprise. Boy, does he know how to get to my heart! Again, feeling undeserving, but so thankful for such thoughtfulness and love being displayed from my family to me. What a blessed woman I am.
I don’t write all this to brag, but I couldn’t help but think about moms whose families perhaps overlooked making Mother’s Day a special day. Maybe that mother was you. You still got up and fixed the breakfast on Mother’s Day, prepared the lunch, or had to do all the normal things in taking care of a young family. It may have been due to the fact that your family is too young to know what to do and your hubby isn’t creative in this department. Perhaps there isn’t a husband in your home to honor you, for whatever reason. Can I encourage you with my own dealings with that some years ago?
My husband has always known how to make my birthday memorable, but when it came to Mother’s Day his focus was his own mom. He left the girls on their own to get me a card or gift. He didn’t usually even say, Happy Mother’s Day because “I’m not his mother”. Every year I would gear myself up hoping that it would be different and he would realize that because I am the mother of his children he would do something! I set myself up for disappointment time after time.
I will never forget the Mother’s Day that the Lord took me to Psalm 62:5 – My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him. The Lord showed me that I cannot put my expectations on my husband, my daughters, or any other human being, for that matter. I could only look to my God. He never disappoints me. He never lets me down. All that He’s promised He will fulfill. I gave over that expectation that day and asked my husband to forgive me for imprisoning him because of my expectations. After that year Mother’s Days were so much sweeter! If I got a card or gift, or I didn’t, it was okay because my expectations were only set on the Lord. I’d pray, “Lord, I’m mothering these girls for You. Help me to keep my focus on eternity.” Even though my husband has made a complete about-face on this special holiday, every year I remember the lesson l learned from Psalm 62. I’m sure the Lord allowed that so I’d draw closer to Him.
I pray that encourages you. We all have a tendency to have things we think others ought be be or do because of their position, but we really have no right. Let’s keep our expectations on the Lord alone; only then are we sure we’ll never be disappointed.
A Tribute to My Mom
When I was growing up I thought everyone had a home like mine, but when I got to college I found out that there were many girls that didn’t have the privilege of having a godly mother as I had. I got a whole new appreciation for my mom after hearing others share their stories. What kind of mom did I have? I’m so glad you were wondering, because I’d love to tell you about her.
My mom is a woman who accepted Christ as her Savior when she was a young girl. One day while listening to a radio broadcast with Uncle Charlie she heard the Gospel and trusted in Jesus as her personal Savior. It made a difference in her life from that point on. She loved Him and desired to be a godly wife and mother. I watched her at home and at church and saw her live her Christian walk consistently. Not all moms do that, but mine did.
I always knew that I could tell my mom anything. If I had a question about something I knew she would tell me the truth. When I got old enough to wonder about Santa Claus’ reality I asked my mom. Her answer was, “There is a Santa if you believe in Him.” Well that was all I needed to hear. I knew what she was gently telling me. I was disappointed, but I’d gotten the truth. Not all mom’s speak the truth, but mine did.
When I started dating, my mom kept the communication lines open and I would tell her everything. When I went to college she would encourage me when things got hard. I accepted a job in South Carolina, miles from home in Kentucky, and she and my dad took me down to get me settled in. I wrote in my journal that day that my mom told me if I wasn’t happy there or felt I’d made a mistake in this decision I would always be welcome to come home. Though I was sure this was God’s leading, she comforted me with those words. She wasn’t my buddy, she was my mom. I knew she loved me and had wisdom that I needed. She is indeed very wise and has given tremendous counsel to me when I’ve sought for it. Not all mom’s share godly wisdom, but mine did.
She is a woman of exquisite taste and she allowed her love for beautiful things to flow into her home. I always feel the need to come home and redecorate, reorganize and clean when I’ve made a visit to my mom’s house. Everything is perfect (Dad has a huge hand in this too…he’s a gardener extraordinaire and can fix or make anything she dreams up!). I grew up with her creativity around me in the form of her resourcefulness when money wasn’t necessarily there. She created dresses for me and my sisters that made me feel loved and cared for when I wore what she had sewn. Not all mom’s take the time and effort to make their families feel special, but mine did.
Her creativity was also seen in meals she prepared for our family. We had a scrumptious dinner together every day, as well as lingering conversation around the table afterwards. She used the good dishes on Sunday, teaching us girls to be comfortable in a more formal setting. Not all moms take the time to make mealtime an event, but mine did.
She has the gift of hospitality and has welcomed many people in her home. She has a heart for those that are needy. A troubled teen girl lived with us for a time. She also took in her English aunt (Aunt Violet), who was in her 70’s, I believe. Aunt Violet was a blessing to us with her gift for making English pastries and entertaining us with her stories, but I know that my mom’s companionship was a blessing to my great aunt at a lonely time in her life. Preachers, evangelists, and visiting groups from college have been guests at my mom’s table; I’m sure they remember the occasion that brought them there. Not all moms are willing to share what they have with others that are unable to return the favor, but mine did.
One trait I love about my mom is that she can laugh at herself. She’s has had a knack over the years for doing some very funny things and getting herself into some hilarious situations. As we laugh at what she’s done, she laughs right along with us, then ends with, “Well?” Her innocence makes it even funnier. Not everyone can laugh when they make a mistake, but she did.
As a grandmother she has been a blessing in the lives of her grandchildren. Our daughter, Whitney, had the blessing of spending many weeks in the summertime with her grandparents. It was a time in her teen years when she needed the nurturing that a Nana has the time and ability to give – not all do it, but my mom did.
I thank the Lord for the home in which He placed me. I was and am privileged to call Millie Ray my mom. I wouldn’t trade her or my growing up years for anything. Not all daughters had a wonderful mom, but I did!
I love you, Mom. Happy Mother’s Day!
