I went through my refrigerator this weekend and did some tossing of some old things. A couple slices of bread that weren’t exactly fresh, and some leftovers that were now a bit too leftover (eew! It happens). No one wants to eat old food!
But what do we do with the “old things” in marriage? By old things I mean the things we’re used to. We’re used to him leaving for work; we’re used to him coming in each night. We’re used to fixing supper for him, cleaning up after him, kissing him goodnight, seeing his face across from the table, sitting beside him in church…and so on. It can be taken for granted. It can get old if we’re not careful. Hence the encouragement for these Monday Marriage Matters posts. Marriage really does matter; it’s the second most important relationship – the first being our relationship with the Lord. So, why do we overlook it? Why do we just endure?
Here’s a collage of my attempts to demonstrate my desire to keep our marriage fresh. None of these will wow. None will be the most unique demonstration of love in marriage, but you know what? Each one does contribute to my marriage, in their small way, and that’s what this whole series is about. It’s the little things, the little moments, the little thoughtful gestures that keep that something special in a marriage. It keeps it from getting old – moldy, if you will.
The top left is a screen shot of our texts. My husband was meeting a friend for lunch and dropped me off on his way. He stopped and bought me lunch because he didn’t want me to wait to eat until after he was finished. As I sat there eating my grilled Chick-fil-A, I thought about how thoughtful that was of him, so I sent him a text to say “thank you for lunch!” It would be easy to overlook those kinds of gestures, but staying in the habit of saying , “thank you” and “You’re welcome!” keeps things fresh!
The next picture on top is a weekly “chore” I do for my husband. I make him homemade granola. He LOVES it, so I try to always have it on hand for his breakfast. When I slide the pan into the oven I usually always call to him in his office, “I love you!” His response is, “You’re making granola!” Food can talk, can’t it?!
Sometimes a little reminder to leave a note is helpful – like this chalkboard. We use this one frequently to say how much the other is loved! “More than chocolate” says a lot! =)
The second picture collage shows planned date nights. One was a blue grass concert that we attended together. My husband saw that this super-good group was going to be in our area the next week and he made the plans and bought the tickets for us to attend. I love it when he plans ahead and we can look forward to that time together! Afterwards we stopped for a late night snack and had the best time just having a date night! The other date was dinner at home – our favorite place!
Lastly, is my stack of note cards specifically for your husband. They have a phrase on each card with room to add a note. I have put them in his Bible, at his desk or on his pillow when I’m going away. He was gone for a couple nights this month to shepherd a sweet family in our church going through a difficult surgery. I stuck a couple notes in his luggage to remind him I’d miss him while he was away. (I found these at Hobby Lobby)
It’s just the day to day maintenance that my refrigerator needs, but more than that, my marriage needs it so nothing strange ends up on our plates! I’d rather serve fresh love than dry, moldy “I’m used to you” attitudes, how about you?!
What did you do yesterday to demonstrate to your mate that your marriage matters?
Refresh your marriage,