Christian growth · Christian Life · Christian love · Dates · Family life · Husband · Love · Marriage · tongue · Uncategorized

Win the Argument

 

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My husband and I have been arguing again. You know how that goes. It’s over a topic we’ve discussed before – serving one another. The conversation went something like this:

Me – Let me do that for you.

Him – No, I already took care of it, but thank you.

Me – I can never seem to find a way to serve you: you always beat me to it! You do so much more for me than I do you.

Him – Hon, that’s not true! You do so much for me. Goodness, I couldn’t do what I do on a day without you!

Continue reading “Win the Argument”

Dates · Marriage

Family Friday – Make the Effort for Marriage Get-Away’s

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Work.  Hardly anything in this life comes without it, including a good marriage.  It takes both spouses giving, caring, respecting, sharing, planning and moving to action.

One important attribute to a healthy, growing marriage is time together without other distractions – children, work, pressures, responsibilities or cell phones buzzing.  Some would shake their head and say, “There’s no way that could happen!”  It will take work, but you can make it happen.

I’m so appreciative that over the 36 years of our marriage, my husband has always carved out time for us to share alone time.  When our girls were home, it might only be an hour out for coffee, but it was time away that we needed.  As they grew older, we went away for an overnight reprieve a couple times a year.  Then we even began every other year going away for a week at the time of our anniversary.    There was always lots of work on both our parts to make these times happen, but when we came home refreshed, more in love, and also ready to jump back into parenting and ministry obligations and pressures, we knew it was well worth it.

Now that we’re empty nesters, we continue to make time to go away.  Oh, we have the house all to ourselves, and we’re alone, but the pressures and responsibilities are still around us at home.  It takes leaving town to be able to focus and spend quality time together.

I’d love to encourage those of you who are married to work hard at planning get-away’s so you can talk uninterrupted, have fun, go places you’ve dreamed about, and strengthen your marriage in the process!  Here are some suggestions, starting with short times away, leading to longer excursions.

Short times away:

  • Drive-In to a place like Sonic.  Order then sit in the car and enjoy some alone time.
  • Take a game like Farkle  or Tenzi  (just learned about this game – lots of fun!) to Starbucks.  Have coffee and play the game together.
  • Go to the bookstore or library and look at books about a place you’d like to travel together.
  • If you’re coffee lovers, try to hit all the coffee shops in your area over a period of six months, visiting a different one each time you date.  Try different coffee drinks.  If you’re not a coffee-lover, try out ice cream places!!
  • Pack a picnic lunch and drive to a pretty spot and enjoy it in the car. Talk.  Listen to music.  Be still.

Little ones at home:

  • Reserve a hotel at a town near you. Get a babysitter for the night.  Spend overnight and grab breakfast before heading home. You’ll be close enough if you’re needed at a moment’s notice.
  • Attend a family camp at a place like The Wilds.  They have weekend retreats or week-long camps.  Childcare is provided during preaching sessions.  You can be refreshed and so will your children, in a safe environment that will build your marriage and your family!

Longer times away:

  • Plan for a week away for a significant anniversary.  The anticipation of that planned trip is half the fun!  Make plans in advance so you can get things arranged at home, but also so you can look forward to that time away!
  • Look during the off-season for places to stay that would normally be out of your price range.  Booking time to stay there then not only reduces the cost, it also reduces the noise and distractions!

Last week was my husband’s birthday and we went away for a two-night excursion.  My parents had told us for years about The Homestead in Hot Springs, VA.  We had looked into it before, but felt it was out of our price range.  Around Christmastime my husband saw on the Internet that they were running some great deals in the wintertime.  So, we decided then to book a room for his January birthday.  Oh, my!  The time there was so refreshing and wonderful!  I’ll give you a little peek into our stay:

The historic inn is stunning from the first view!

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The entrance of the hotel is breathtaking!  Every day from 3:00 – 4:00 they serve Tea in this gorgeous lobby!

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The first afternoon Cranberry Scones were served with each cup of tea. Yum!!

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A second-floor view of the lobby.

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The spa pool with mineral springs – This is an additional fee, so we opted out!

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However, the outdoor pool and hot tub had water that was 85° and 105°.  Spite the fact that is was 48° outside, we decided to go for it, and we had a lovely soak in the hot water! We also made a special memory swimming outside on such a cool day!!

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God is so good to allow us time away at such a lovely place at such a great reduced price!

Keep your eyes open for great deals on special places during their slow season. Then make plans and look forward to a special get-away!

Whether it’s a Coke at Sonic or a night at a resort, the best part is spending time with your spouse!  Every marriage needs it!

What will you plan in the near future?

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Dates · Family life · memories

Turn Responsibilities into Special Events

We had the blessing of going to Michigan last weekend where my husband officiated a precious wedding for a couple that are members of our church.  The bride’s hometown is in Michigan, so that was the location for their beautiful wedding.  I lived in the Detroit area until I was 13, so it was fun to go back to a place where I have childhood memories.

The wedding itself was just magical. It snowed the day of the wedding, making it the perfect additional touch!  Isn’t the Lord good?!  Christmas weddings can be beautiful just because of the church and its decor.  Their church was a rented church, so it would be both of their weddings, not just the bride’s.  I loved that!  Plus, this church was gorgeous, as was the bride and her attendants.

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After the wedding event, we had the blessing of going to Greenfield Village for their Holiday Nights.  What a fun time we had!  It was romantic, musical, cold, snowy, festive, and fun!  We absolutely loved the whole night!

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No, we didn’t skate, though I really, really wanted to!

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As we were traveling home, my husband stopped for coffee, and beside the coffee shop was a gourmet popcorn shop, Shirley’s Gourmet Popcorn Company.  My husband slipped inside while I was in the car.  He bought three different flavors and of the two I’ve tried, I can attest to the fact that their popcorn is some of the best I’ve had!!

It was a busy weekend, but we were so thankful for all the times we had to share special memories together, such as our evening at Greenfield Village, coffee at a new-to-us place, and popcorn on the long trek home.  That wedding weekend wasn’t just special to the couple who got married, it was special to us as a couple!

It’s so important to make special events out of the things that are responsibilities.  Turn an errand to town, a trip to the grocery store, an evening at school performance or ball game by looking for the fun in each of those things.  Put your phone down.  Look at the people around you.  Stop for the caloric Krispy Kreme doughnut and hot chocolate – or the yummy gourmet popcorn!  Enjoy the brief snow flurries by getting out and watching them come down.  Hold hands with your husband while you’re out.  Do the sporadic thing that pops into your head.  Enjoy each moment.  Turn the small things into big things!

Refresh yourself and those around you by turning the little things into big, special things this weekend!

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Dates · Marriage · Refreshment in marriage · Uncategorized

Taking the Guess-Work Out of Date Night

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Who doesn’t love a fun date night?  Getting dressed up, going somewhere fun and spending time together is a great way to recharge your marriage.  But there can to be two problems when a man and woman are going to go out for a date:

  1. They always go to the same place because they can’t think of something new.
  2. They’re afraid to say what they really want to do, or they can’t make up their mind, so they go back and forth with, “Where do you want to go?”  “I don’t care, you decide!”

Does this sound familiar?

I have a couple suggestions for you that will alleviate both of those issues:

Resolution #1. –  Either Google “New restaurants (or stores, etc) in our area”, or use another kind of guide with that information to find new possibilities, like your newspaper.

It’s easy to fall into a rut!  You go to your favorite restaurant, get dinner and call it a night.  But with the world around us growing as it is, there’s no need for that to happen.  In our city and I’m sure in most areas of the world, new businesses, walking/biking paths, books stores, and restaurants are popping up every year, giving opportunities for new adventures.

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Recently our local newspaper published their 2017 Reader’s Choice Awards.  In it are Restaurants with the best french fries, Asian foods, barbecue ribs, pies, doughnuts, desserts, coffee, Stores including gift stores, department stores and book stores. It goes on and on, listing the best of all kinds of fun places to shop, eat, be entertained or pampered.  I couldn’t believe how many places were recommended that I’d never even heard of!  I am writing those places into a book of date idea places.  The next time we want to “try something different,” we’ll simply open the book and make a new choice!

You could also write the names of the places you want to try on Popsicle sticks and put them in a jar.  Draw one out and do it when Date Night rolls around.

I love this idea of color-coding so you can make a more careful choice regarding price range or planning ahead.

125 colored popsicle sticks-$5. Mason jar-$4. 100 date ideas!

Resolution to #2. –  Take turns deciding.  When it comes down to making the choice of which place you should go, do this – He chooses this week, you choose the next.  It takes the pressure off trying to be sure he likes the place, and vice versa.  This way, you both get the chance to decide and if it’s not the best, well, next week they can make the choice!

Don’t allow boredom or indecision to ruin your date night!  Mix it up a little and make the most of the time you take to share a special evening together!

Refresh your marriage!

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