Marriage · Refreshment in marriage · Uncategorized

The Cost of Neglect in Marriage

After a lovely week’s vacation, a stroll in my yard brought sights like this…


Weeds!  It’s amazing what just a little time away will do to a summer yard!

Proverbs 10:4 reminds us ~

He becometh poor that dealeth with a slack hand:
but the hand of the diligent maketh rich.

My hand had been idle, while on vacation, but when the temperatures had cooled off some and the humidity was in breathing range, I donned my garden gloves and headed out to give this poor Dianthus some badly needed attention.  My hand was diligent to take care of the neglected landscape.

While I was tugging and pulling at the stubborn intruders, the Lord brought to my mind a simple truth: neglect in any area of our lives spells t-r-o-u-b-l-e!  You name it – if you neglect your health, your work, or your spiritual walk, it’s an invitation to disaster.

Let’s think about another area in which neglect is deadly…a marriage.  It’s so easy to Continue reading “The Cost of Neglect in Marriage”


The Why and the How-To of Stockpiling

Stockpiling – To accumulate a large stock of goods or materials. Unlike hoarding, when a person fills their pantry and freezer with goods, it has a goal and purpose. The two reasons I stockpile are:

  1. To be prepared ahead of time for certain meals or needs.
  2. To Save both money and time!

The method of stockpiling is simply done when grocery items are at their lowest price.  Continue reading “The Why and the How-To of Stockpiling”


Lies I Believe About Myself


The very morning after our recent small group study on Lies Women Believe about themselves, I woke up and stepped out on my back patio to enjoy the cool summer air.  The sun had only been up a little while, and when I looked up, I saw workers at the new house that’s been built behind us.  It is near completion, and from the day they broke ground, I have grunted and groaned over the interruption in our country life solitude. I stood there now, thinking about how I need my quiet out on our patio.  Immediately after that thought went through my mind, the Holy Spirit reminded me of the one of the lies we had talked about the night before – it’s the lie that

I have the right to…

That is a lie from Satan because as a believer in Christ, I understand that the only thing  I deserve is hell, and by God’s grace, He rescued me from that and has given me so much more in His kindness.  Do I love my quiet and privacy?  Yes.  Do I deserve my  quiet and privacy?  No.

This study by Nancy DeMoss Wolgemuth has revealed that that isn’t the only lie about myself that I’ve been believing.   Here are six she suggested. Read on and see if you recognize any in your own thoughts.

  1. I am not worth anything. We show we believe this when we allow our value to be determined by others.  A hurtful remark made about our physical features is allowed to govern the way we see ourselves.  We feel the need to be accepted by others and desire their approval.
    The Truth – My value is determned by what God thinks of me – not others.  Psalm 139
  2. I can’t help the way I am. If we believe our bad temper has simply been passed down from our family tree, or our weight issues are because “everyone in my family has a struggle losing weight,” we’ve bought into the lie that we can’t do anything about sinful tendencies.
    The Truth – I am responsible for my own choices and I can be changed through the power of the Holy Spirit.  I Cor. 5:17
  3. I need to learn to love myself.  We are bombarded with this lie by the world.  We prove we love ourselves by the way we take care of ourselves with food, sleep and relief from pain.  We get our feelings hurt and are touchy because we love ourselves.  If we didn’t care about ourselves, we wouldn’t care so much about being rejected and mistreated.
    The truth – We must learn to deny ourselves, as Christ did.  Our problem is not a low self esteem, it is a low view of God.  Realize how much He loves us! Romans 5:8
  4. I have my rights.  When moms demand a little solitude, or a wife feels she has the right to speak her peace, we’re showing our belief in this lie.  From fast food commercials telling  us we can have it our way, to hearing the crowd yell, “we have our rights,” we have been led astray. I heard about a woman who sued the Weather Channel on the local news cast for forecasting the weather incorrectly.  She got rained on when it was supposed to be sunny and got sick.  She won the law suit!!!
    The truth – We must yield all our rights to the One who ultimately holds all rights.  Psalm 37:1-11
  5. Physical beauty matters more than inner beauty.  Who hasn’t bought into this lie?  We fret over five pounds, check the mirror for wrinkles, and then worry about getting old, when of course we all are!  We fight looking older and do all we can to keep it from happening.  There’s nothing wrong with looking our best, but we can’t let our looks consume us.  Do we give as much time to the inner man as we do the outer?  Are we as concerned with the lack of spiritual growth as we are with the increase in aging of our bodies? 
    The truth – There has to be a healthy balance between looking our best and not letting it be what drives us. Instead, may we be driven to our knees to become a woman with a meek and quiet spirit which is of great price. I Peter 3:3-5
  6. I should not have to live with unfulfilled longings. We want something but can’t affort it?  Charge it.  We hunger for a craving, but we’ve already eaten enough?  We eat it anyway.  We feel unfulfilled in our marriage, so we feel justified in seeking a relationshp outside our marriage.  Not all longings are evil – so why should we have to live without them being fulfilled?
    The Truth – God doesn’t always fulfill our longings right away or sometimes at all.  Why? So we will depend on Him.  That longing can become what drives us to our knees each day to seek His face and help in this desire.  Psalm 34:8-10

Lies about ourselves are painful to identify, but we need to honestly look at what we’re really believing and admit the areas that are lie.  Then when we replace the lies with the Truth, we can enjoy the freedom that no Women’s Rights Activist group could ever give us.  It comes from the great God Who made us and loves us just as we are!

Do you recognize any lies here that you’ve been believing?

Denise Signature 150 px

Bread · Overwhelmed · Priorities · Uncategorized

Overwhelmed or Refreshed By Life?

road 1

I’m just so overwhelmed!

Those words came from a wife, mom, employee, church member, daughter, daughter-in-law, who probably has lots more roles that she plays.  We’ve all been in the place where we feel like the pressures from every side are coming in on us.  So, how in the world DO we handle all those responsibilities?  They all need attention.  They’re all important, but we know we aren’t superwoman with super-powers enabling us to conquer the world in which we are engulfed.

What’s a woman to do? How do we get it all done?

I think we all have to re-evaluate often.  When we feel pressure about several things that need our attention, we have to stop and ask:

Is my life exemplifying a life that a is given over to the Lord to do as He wills each day?
Am I obeying His Word and priorities for my life?
Do my words and my actions match?

For instance, I love writing my blog, and my passion here is all about refreshment that begins with a relationship with Jesus Christ and then moves to family/home, then church and others.  If I follow the things I teach from God’s Word, I will keep blogging its right place.

This week we were able to make a quick trip to visit my family in Kentucky.  We celebrated Memorial Day on the lake with my sisters, their husbands and our parents.  It was a fabulous day.  At the end of the boating excursion and return to my parent’s home, we decided since it was late in the afternoon, we would wait and come home on Tuesday.  No blog post had been written for Tuesday, but I had a decision to make – visit with my family for those hours, or interrupt it with computer time.  The choice was simple. We had a great visit!

Here are some other practical examples that might happen in my life:

If it comes between…

  • Quiet time in God’s Word and rushing out the door…which will I choose? God is first.
  • Time at my church for services or time with visiting relatives?  God is first.
  • Time with friends at an extra outside activity or time I’d planned with my family?  Family is first.
  • Bible study with my small group or time to chill and watch a movie?  Others are first.
  • Time with my grandsons or time with my husband?  He is first.
  • Time to exercise or time to pray? God is first.
  • Time watching my friend’s children or watching my grandsons?  Family is first.

There are many times that I have regretted the poor decision to shift my priorities.  But I pray each day that the Lord will direct my steps and help me make the best choice, and He does when I lean in for His guidance.

One day last week I had an idea of what I would do that day and it got completely changed.  One event was when a friend stopped by.  She later sent a text apologizing for “keeping me,” but as I told her, when you give your day to the Lord, you take whatever He sends, and sometimes He sends the blessing of time with a friend when you didn’t expect it!  The Lord knew I needed that, even though I didn’t schedule it, He did! It refreshed me!

We need the Lord every single day for every moment of the day.  Rather than feeling overwhelmed, rest in God’s priorities for your life, and listen to His leading.  His plans are always better than what we could dream up, and when we lay our head on our pillow at night, we can say what Jesus said, “Lord, I have done the work you gave me to do.” His ways don’t overwhelm; they refresh.

What areas of your life do you need to re-evaluate according to God’s priorities for your life? Where do you feel most overwhelmed?

Don’t stress – Stay refreshed.





Memorial Day

I think this may be my favorite song about our great country –

My country, ’tis of Thee,

Sweet land of Liberty,

Of thee I sing;

Land where my fathers died,

Land of the pilgrims’ pride,

From every mountainside

Let Freedom ring.

Our fathers’ God to Thee

Author of liberty,

To Thee we sing.

Long may our land be bright

With freedom’s holy light,

Protect us by Thy might,

Great God our King.

Happy Memorial Day!