Three Things You Can Do Today To Improve You Marriage

February 26, 2021February 25, 2021 RefreshHerLeave a comment

Like any relationship, marriage can get into a rut. It sounds the same as when you hit those rumble strips on the interstate. It’s irritating, and it makes you move over, but often it’s not long before you hear that roar again. Why? Because you’re kind of daydreaming your way through your marriage.

It’s easy to “fall asleep at the wheel” and not make the efforts in your relationship that you used to make when things were new and fresh. But I have good news for you today! If you’re still breathing and your husband also has breath, things can change TODAY! Let me make three simple suggestions – all that are doable today and cost nothing except your intentionality!

SMILE DAILY (use your lips and your eyes to smile!)
When he walks in the door. Smile.
While you’re listening to him. Smile.
When you’re telling him about your day. Smile.
When you see him across the room. Smile.
It’s easier to be too busy to even look up at one another. It’s easier to furrow our brows and scowl. SMILE instead.
A merry heart doeth good like a medicine. Proverbs 17:22
MAKE MORE DEPOSITS INTO YOUR MARRIAGE THAN WITHDRAWALS EACH DAY
Deposit a compliment instead of criticism. Instead of fussing about the negative thing you’re thinking about, give a compliment of something in which he made you proud.
Deposit help instead of looking to receive help. I believe husbands should help their wife, but what would happen if we volunteered to run an errand, lift a load, or do a chore for him? Would we look like Christ in our sacrifice?
Deposit affection instead of pulling away physically and emotionally. Put away that cold shoulder, little peck, or icy back. Pull the wall down with the warmth of your affection.
Romans 12:10 Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another.
PRAY FOR YOUR HUSBAND FOR AT LEAST FIVE MINUTES EVERY DAY.
Pray about the things that irritate you.
Pray about the weaknesses in your relationship.
Pray for his burdens, pressures and obligations.
Pray for your hearts to be knit together stronger than ever.
Luke 18:1 – Men (women) aught always to pray and not to faint.

Dear wife, I’m convinced that if we would practice these three initiatives DAILY we would have happy husbands, which would equal happy wives, and that boils down to a happy marriage! Try it and tell me about your results!

Refresh your marriage TODAY!

Marriage · Refreshment in marriage · The Scenic Route · Winter

Winter Vacation on the Scenic Route

December 11, 2020December 10, 2020 RefreshHer8 Comments

Most people probably only think of a beach vacation when the temps make the thermometer and your face equally red. But I’ve learned in the last two December’s that being at the beach when it’s cooler is a blessing! My husband and I went to Hilton Head last December and loved it. Here are a few reasons I love the beach in the winter…

It is the perfect respite after a very busy fall season and before Christmas arrives.
It’s not sweltering!
It’s much more modest (see bullet above!)
You pretty much have the beach to yourselves!
The cities are quiet.
It’s so restful!

After our first winter beach trip, we decided that we needed to consider vacationing before Christmas again so we could enjoy all those benefits. That’s exactly where we’ve been this past week. Due to the cancellations caused by Covid this year, our plans were held very lightly in our hands. We knew only the Lord would keep us well and allow us the blessing of traveling to another state for vacation. What a gift this week has been!

If you have been following my blog for long, you know that one thing my husband and I enjoy doing as dates is traveling on the Scenic Route. We enjoy taking the side roads and stopping along the way to enjoy the sights that pique our interest. Yes, it takes longer, but we love making a memory while spending time together.

Here’s a little window into our Winter Vacation on the Scenic Route ~

We both loving walking/running on the beach. Though we don’t stay side by side, we stay in touch with one another and love that we share the love of outdoor exercise.

We try to catch the sunrise every morning. The blessing of winter sunrisew is that they’re a little later than summertime! This one came up at a little after 7:00, meaning we could sleep in a little!

We had so much fun one day when we got to have lunch with new friends that we met this fall. We spent several hours in fellowship with them and it was so refreshing and encouraging!

We love visiting churches when we are on vacation. The church we visited last Sunday had communion, giving us the blessing of sharing this time together. Since Dale is a pastor, we seldom get to share this ordinance side by side! It was sweet.

Our time away simply allowed us to be together…our favorite thing! We don’t need to be entertained, we just like being with one another. We may sit in the same room in silence as we each work on projects, but we’re okay with that because we’re together. We do spend time chatting about upcoming decisions, God’s Word, plans for the future and memories from the past.

We’ve created some new memories this week on our second winter beach vacation and we are grateful for each part on the Scenic Route!

Have you ever vacationed at the beach in winter?

Refreshment in marriage · The Scenic Route

Stay-Cation on the Scenic Route

July 10, 2020July 9, 2020 RefreshHer10 Comments

Dale and I have enjoyed a few days of a “Stay-cation” this week, meaning we have taken some of his vacation days to travel locally. What a blessing it has been to take some day trips and see sights in our area. Of course, you know we didn’t take the main roads! We traveled so many curvy country roads I didn’t regret not getting passes to Dollywood this summer! =)

One day trip took us Midway, Tennessee where we visited this lovely covered bridge. It was so quiet there. We sat on a large rock near the bridge and just listened to the water and the stillness.

While winding through the scenic routes, we were greeted with some incredible rainbows! We saw them spanning mountains, reaching over lakes and embellishing country churches. They were breathtaking…

Watauga Lake is about an hour from us and has become a favorite spot for a picnic or just sitting and watching the boats.

As you can see in these pictures, we’ve had some awesome times together this week on the Scenic Route “Stay-Cation!” We’ve listened to CD’s as we traversed the country. We have eaten simply, but well. We have read Scripture at a picnic table, sat quietly with no words, and also bowed our hearts and heads together in prayer.

Sometimes the Scenic Route is so very simple. It reminds me that just like we “stayed” close to home, we want to “stay” in love and close to one another. It doesn’t necessarily have to cost much in terms of money, but it costs in relation to being intentional – just doing it!

So, I ask you, what simple thing could you and your spouse do even this weekend? Just the two of you!

Is there a local spot you could enjoy together? A lake? An historic spot you’ve not visited? A country road you’ve never driven? Why not pack a simple picnic lunch and head out in the near future? You might have so much fun you’ll forget you missed this year’s destination vacation!

Refresh your marriage with a Stay-Cation on the Scenic Route!

For other Scenic Route dates look here and here for starters!

Christian love · Family life · home · Husband · joy · Love · Marriage · refreshment at home · Refreshment in marriage

Make More Deposits

June 13, 2017June 13, 2017 RefreshHer2 Comments

While waiting in line at the bank, a man developed a very loud case of hiccups. By the time he reached the teller’s window, the hiccups seemed to have worsened. The teller took the man’s check and proceeded to run a computer verification of his account.

After a minute she looked up from her terminal with a frown and said that she would be unable to cash his check.”Why not?” the man asked incredulously.

”I’m sorry, sir,” she replied, ” but our computer indicates that you do not have sufficient funds to cover this amount. As a matter of fact,” she continued, “our records show your account overdrawn in excess of $5000.””It can’t be!” he cried. “You have to be kidding!” “Yes, I am,” she answered with a smile, counting out his cash. “But you will notice that your hiccups are gone.”

Probably most of us know the sinking feeling to know of one time or another when there weren’t sufficient funds in the bank to cover our withdrawals. It makes for a rough day, doesn’t it?

While we are ever so careful to guard our bank account from being over drawn, I wonder what the records would show on the monthly statement of our marriage? How many withdrawals have you made? Wives need love, affection, attention, compliments, encouragement, dates, pampering, help around the house, a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on… Each one of those represent a withdrawal from our marriage account.

We can also make withdrawals by nagging, belittling, giving a cold shoulder, being unforgiving, negligent to his needs, etc.

Now, think back on this past week – what kind of deposits have you made? Not the monetary kind – but the relational kind.

Have you shown respect for your husband with your words?
Have you elevated him in front of others?
Have you thanked him for being a provider for your family?
Have you done a thoughtful gesture for him? (Bought his favorite candy bar, written him a note, made his favorite meal, took him out on a special date or created one at home- you get the idea)
Have you spent time doing something he enjoys even though it might not be your favorite activity?
Have you done something to lighten his load?

These things (and many others) are ways we make deposits into our marriage. There’s a double blessing here – we’re meeting the needs of our husband and rediscovering what a joy it is to be married. It’s fun! It is God’s plan and He can only do what is good!

Take a thorough check into your “account” and make sure you’re not overdrawn! If it’s been a while since you’ve put something into your marriage, you might surprise your husband so much you’ll scare his hiccups away!

Refresh you marriage today!!

Come back the rest of this week for more marriage posts that will encourage you to make your relationship the best it can be!

With love,

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