Christian love · home · Love

My New Heroes

baby a.jpg

Have you ever wished you could be a hero?  It takes a lot to be one!

It takes sacrifice.

It takes self-denial.

It takes commitment.

Those I have always considered true heroes:

  • Men and women who have given their lives for the sake of the Gospel
  • Men and women who have given their lives for our country

However, recently I’ve come to understand that there is another group of people who rightfully belong in the category with heroes:

  • Men and women who have opened their hearts and their homes to love and care for a child (or children) in foster care (especially believers who reach out to show Christ’s love to these little ones!)

You see, I’ve had an up-close look at Foster Care because our daughter and son-in-law have become foster parents in the last few months!  (That makes me Gigi to these babies, and I love it!) To watch our daughter and son-in-law’s sacrifice, commitment and self-denial for the little ones in their care has been amazing. 

They attended many weeks of training classes, had home studies, were fingerprinted, checked and re-checked before they were ever considered eligible to welcome a child into their home.

They went from freedom to go and do whatever/whenever to caring for the demands of infants literally overnight – no nine months prep for their adjustment!

They took on not one, but two children.  The demands of two infants is incredible, and to take that on yourself for ones that aren’t your own flesh and blood shows true servanthood.

They have taken numerous 5-hour trips to take the babies to doctor’s appointments because of their physical needs.

They have had to rearrange their work schedules, put their personal vacations on hold, and cut back on outings, due to the needs of the babies.

They get much less sleep caring for infants!

They have to keep up with the system’s demands – attending more classes about foster parenting (while they’re caring for the children), getting the children to family visitations, which meet the birth parent’s time schedule more than their own.

They endure some who give demeaning looks/remarks towards them because they use WIC to purchase formula.  (Wow.  We don’t always know all the facts, do we?)

They are spoken “down” to by some of the medical staff because they’re “only the foster parent.”  They’ve spent more time with these children than the birth parents have.  Shouldn’t they be given an ear because they do understand their needs?

But spite all of that, they press on with the most loving parental hearts – kissing, hugging, talking and cooing to those little ones as though they were their own.  They don’t neglect to care for one need.  Their hearts cry when one has to be poked on at the doctor’s office.  They are sympathetic to the one who is sleepless in the middle of the night and they rock and sing songs of Jesus’ love, while their own sleepy eyes fight to stay awake.

I had the pleasure this week of helping care for the babies while our son-in-law was at a conference.  I watched with my own eyes the care and concern of these heroes who love with a love that reminds me of my great God who loved me when I was not yet His, and of how He sent His Son to adopt me and make me a part of His family.  God loves me.  These foster parents love these children with Christ’s love.  God loves these foster children!  This morning  I rejoiced as I read Psalm 10:14b –

Thou art the helper of the fatherless.

And what does God do for the believer who takes care of one of these children?

Whoever is generous to the poor lends to the Lord,
    and he will repay him for his deed

God will bless those who serve in this ministry!  I’m watching it happen in my own family.  It’s precious!

I have known others who have opened their homes, but until now I hadn’t seen it up really close.  I salute each one who sacrifices to give a child a safe, loving environment! Let’s be looking for ways to encourage and thank these heroes who have sacrificed so that a child can have a happy household in which to grow, live, to also hear about the Lord Jesus!

Whitney at Come Home for Comfort wrote a great post about how to support those who are foster parents.  I hope you’ll go here and check it out!

Also, did you know that President Trump has named May as National Foster Care Month?

While you are on Whitney’s site, will you scroll down and read the comment left by Elaine?  She shared her sweet testimony of being a foster mom for 17 years!  Wow!  Her story may encourage you to check into being a foster parent.  So many children are in need; maybe the Lord would have you open your home and become a hero in a child’s life!

God bless each of you foster parents!  I pray many children will come to know Christ because of your sacrifice!

Denise Signature 150 px

Family life · home · Motherhood

Family Friday – Mom’s – It Will Pass!

If you’re a parent perhaps you can remember when you brought the first child into your home, every older person probably gave you the same advice, “Enjoy them while they’re little; they grow up so fast!”  Maybe you’re struggling today with sleepless nights, potty training, disobedience, bad attitudes, lying, or rebellion and you’re having a hard time seeing the end of the Parenting Finish Line.  I just want to remind you, friend, it’s out there, and the time is clicking away.

Instead of feeling frustrated, instead of wishing away their lives, or ignoring it all by drowning it out with entertainment, social media or a job that will take you away, can I just say this – Enjoy today!  It’s a gift from God.  All that other stuff will pass, but so will the sweet times – tea parties, bath time water wars, Family fun nights, hands held around the kitchen table, good night kisses at bedtime. It will be gone.  Oh they’ll still be your kids, but those years are gone (and we need to let them go!).  So, enjoy it today while it’s all around you.

Even if those feet aren’t so little any more, if they’re still putting their feet under your table, enjoy the day and accept it as God’s gift to you, Mom!

Refresh your momma heart!

Denise Signature 150 px

 

Christian Life · Crafting · home · Home decor

Creating Meaningful, Inexpensive Wall Decor

IAMaI had the fun recently of attending a decorating class focused on home accessories.  The designer said,

Your home should tell your story.

That really got me to thinking.  I asked myself, “What is my story? It’s the Gospel!  That is the whole purpose of my life! How can my home share that by the decor?”  Well, it doesn’t necessarily have to have Bible verses plastered everywhere, but beautiful art that shares the Scriptures is indeed one great way to tell the story of my Savior.

I had a space on a wall in my living room that needed a picture and I had searched everywhere looking for the right size and design, all to no avail.  Then one day when I was working on a Bible study book I’m doing I noticed these “I Am” cards in the back of the book.  They were beautifully done and there were five of them.  It was then that the idea popped into my head that I could frame those and make a grouping for that needy living room wall.  Not only would the help tell our story, it would be an inexpensive way to fill that space perfectly.  So I had the picture part, now for frames…

Instead of going to the store to buy a frame, I went to a stash that I purchased at the Goodwill store last year.  There was a stack of frames – all sizes and styles marked down – way down!  I got all of them for less than $5 and I had a huge pile!!  The one below was .52 and it was perfect for holding three of my five cards.

0505171208

I didn’t like the dark frame, so I painted it white.  Here it is, on its side while the paint dries…

0505171218

My encouragement to anyone needing a picture or two on their wall is, don’t limit yourself to just purchased art, which can be really expensive.  Look for smaller things you can frame, like cards that are themed and would help tell your story.  They could be note cards, cards you receive in the mail, postcards, etc.

Then look for frames at yard sales and Goodwill.  They may be scratched or the wrong color, but a little paint will cover that!

IAM.jpg

The John 14:6 sign was purchased several years ago, but I didn’t have it hanging up anywhere. I realized it would be perfect to add to this grouping.  I still need one more something to hang on the right side so it will be balanced with the other side of the fireplace.  I’ll show you the finished look when that part gets completed.

In the meantime, I hope this inspires you to seek to tell your story, then be creative with how you do it.  Decorating can be done frugally with a little creativity!

If someone asked you, what would you say is the story you would want your home to convey?

Denise Signature 150 px

Family life · God's character · Heaven · home · memories · Motherhood · refreshment at home · Uncategorized

Family Friday – Mother’s Day Dilemnas

That holiday is approaching.  You know, the one where our family bows at our feet, singing our praises for the sacrifices of

  • laundry at midnight
  • science projects aided
  • homemade cookies baked for classroom parties
  • wounds kissed and cleaned
  • A patient, listening ear always ready to fix a relationship problem.

Okay, maybe not.  In reality, likely not.  Not if you still have children in your care.  Not if you’re a single mom.  Not if your husband is caught up in the pressures and stuff of life.  But I’m not here today to shake my finger at them because it’s so easy to forget.

I admit forgetting, too.  As a little girl, I was pretty much only focused on what my mom could and would do for me. Because she was so consistant, I came to expect a hearty meal every day at 5:00, clean clothes in my dresser, hugs when I was mistreated, and words of wisdom to guide my life.  It wasn’t until I became a young adult that I realized how much was sacrificed in order for me to possess that kind of home environment.  It was then that I really learned to say thank you to my loving mom.  I began to comprehend how truly blessed I was.  Every Mother’s Day since then, it’s been my goal to express to her how grateful I am today for all she was and still is.

mom's 80tha.jpg

So let me stop to say, Mom (Millie Ray), thank you for all you did to make home so special.  Thank you for the meals you prepared that were both delicious and graciously served.  Thank you for taking the effort to decorate our home and keep it clean, and also teach me how to do those household tasks.  Thank you for sacrificing your own career so you could be home for us.  Thank you for loving God and making sure I knew Him, too.  And thank you for loving my dad and showing me that marriage was for keeps.  I appreciated it as a child, but today I once again say thank you and I love you!

To all you readers who are moms, I say, enjoy Mother’s Day by not expecting anything from your family.  Put your thoughts on your mom, or some other woman that the Lord has put in your life to encourage you, love you and support you.  Be grateful for them.  Do something to show your gratitude.  Stop and thank the Lord for your children.  Keep your focus on gratitude, rather than on your expectations. I learned this the hard way!

This is one holiday that makes me hurt for some dear women.  To those of you who wish you were a mom and find pain on this day, I say I’m sorry, and even greater, God understands and sees your grief.  Remember that He is a good, good Father, and don’t doubt His love because He has withheld this from you.

To those who didn’t have a loving mom, I say, God saw, God knows, and that is the reason we needed a Savior.  He gave us His son so we could all understand the greatest kind of sacrificial love.

To those whose mom or child is in heaven, remember that we’ll be joining our loved ones sooner than we think, never to be separated again. I love to think about what my daughter, Ashley is enjoying in heaven at this very moment!

Let’s allow Mother’s Day to find us showing our families that our greatest desire is God’s, “Well Done,” and that the joy of His comfort is enough for every pain in our hearts.  There are many coming behind us that need to learn from us that holidays are man-made, but the joy of being a Christlike woman is God-made!  That’s a gift that only He can give us, and that is enough!

Find refreshment in Christ!

Denise Signature 150 px

Family life · God's character · home · Marriage · Motherhood

Family Friday – What To do With Unfulfilled Expectations

wedding cake.jpg

Most little girls grow up playing house with a cute, tiny kitchen set and china dishes filled with sugar water in tiny cups.  We imagine we’re married to Prince Charming who is our adoring husband.  We cradle a baby doll and we coo, and cuddle and kiss its plastic face as though it was the soft, supple skin of a newborn.  We pretend and we anticipate the day when all those dreamed-up situations will come to pass.

Those little girls grow up into womanhood, but then face the disturbing fact that one or more of those childhood rehearsals that they dreamed about never come to fruition.  It might be that a woman…

  • Is still waiting to find her Prince Charming.  It’s easy to feel that “everyone else has a husband, except for me.” She attends and participates in the weddings of all her close friends, but wonders when it will be her turn to find Mr. Right.  That longing can make that woman feel lonely, left out, unwanted or unloved.  Her expectation of being married is unfulfilled.
    Or she
  • Is married, but her husband isn’t the Prince Charming she’d dreamed about.  He doesn’t lead their home spiritually. He is apathetic about God.  He doesn’t help with the children or the house.  He doesn’t listen when she speaks.  He isn’t at all what she thought he would be. She can feel disappointed, trapped, frustrated and even angry.  Her expectation of marriage is unfulfilled.
    Or she
  • Is happily married, but God hasn’t given her a child. The questions and comments from others about “When are you going to have a baby?” Or “You look so natural holding that baby, why don’t you make one?” hurt no less than a dagger in the heart.  She feels unfulfilled, empty, less than a woman, and maybe bitter towards those that hurt her with their words, or even with God. Her expectation of motherhood hasn’t been met.

What is a woman to do in any of these scenarios?

  1. Realize that because there is nothing you can do to change your situation, your total dependence must be upon God.  This is the very best place to be!  The truth is, this describes every woman, no matter her marital status or the number of children she bears.  Satan likes to magnify what we don’t have, so we won’t focus on what we DO have, which is sooooo much!
  2. Get to know God’s character – Who He is.  (Loving, Good, omnipresent, omniscient, faithful, unchanging…) Then you can look at your situation with a right view of God and what He can do in your life!
  3. Take your expectations to Him in prayer and give them up.  Open your hands and surrender your singleness, your husband, or your barrenness to the Lord.  Do this until you’re really ready to let God do what He knows is best.
  4. Transfer all your expectations from the dating service, or nagging your husband, or your plans to leave him until he changes,  or your idea to fix your barrenness, and turn and put those expectations on your mighty God instead.  Psalm 62:5 My soul, wait thou only upon God; for my expectation is from him.  He will never disappoint you.  He will never keep from you what He knows is best.

This week I was struggling with a personal situation and worrying over what might happen if this event took place. It made me afraid and weepy.  Then a dear, godly friend said to me,

If we could see what God sees,
we would want exactly what He has planned because His plan is perfect.

This is where faith steps in.  We look with eyes of faith to an unknown future and what our good God will do and we stop trying to make our plan work!  This changed my attitude!  I knew she was right!
If we believe this, we will wait for God to bring a man into our lives, or to give us peace about singleness.
We will stop trying to be the Holy Spirit in our husband’s life. and we will trust Him to make the changes necessary in him.
We will expect God to do a work that will turn out for my good and His glory, whether or not that includes a baby.
This is what “putting our expectation on Him” looks like!

Then and only then will the feelings described in each of those situations become hope-filled and joyful instead!  Then each woman can say with the psalmist in Psalm 42 –

Why art thou cast down, O my soul? and why art thou disquieted within me?
hope thou in God: for I shall yet praise him,
who is the health of my countenance, and my God.

If one of these scenes describes you, my friend, I want to encourage your heart today that God knows what He is doing, and if you knew what He was up to, you would be full of hope, too!  Throw all your expectations on Him and you’ll not be disappointed!

Denise Signature 150 px