Refreshing Ideas for Summer

July 11, 2017July 11, 2017 RefreshHer2 Comments

beach 3a.jpg

My blog’s purpose is to refresh women in their hearts, homes, and lives. This week I want to focus my posts on specific ways to refresh you and your home this summer! Here are a list of ideas to get you started!

This wonderful warm weather and sunshine is a sweet reminder that summer is here! Woo-hoo! It’s time to add some summer charm to your home and your life. Here are a few suggestions to refresh you this summer!

Gather all the old issues of magazines from the summer months. Scour through them and get some fresh ideas for your yard, a summer wreath, refreshing and cool treats for the summer, and places to visit.
Plan to head to your Farmer’s market this weekend for fresh berries and see what other goodies they may have to offer!
Pick up some pieces of china at a yard sale. Fill a basket with mismatched china, vintage tablecloth and napkins and have it ready for an impromptu picnic.

If you have a clothesline, hang your sheets outside.
Fix up your back deck or patio so it’s inviting for summer breakfast, lunch and/or dinners! Set out some containers of flowers, add party lights, add pillows to your chairs and porch swing, add a blanket for an evening view of the summer sky!
Add some pretty ribbon or twine to your hand-held garden tools so you can hang them in a convenient place.
Put a cotton quilt on the grass in the shade and read to your children. Enjoy lunch out there too!

I hope one or more of these ideas will refresh these summer days for you! Which one spoke to you?

Denise Signature 150 px

baking · Cooking · dessert · Family life · grilling · home · Home making · main dish · Main entree

Individual Berry Cobblers & What We Really Eat

July 3, 2017July 2, 2017 RefreshHer14 Comments

Happy Monday! First let me start with sharing a new recipe that I made as a special treat for my cobbler-loving husband! If you need a treat for Fourth of July these would be perfect. You can make one, or you can multiply the recipe to make as many as you need. These are Berry Cobblers, served in individual ramekins, making them a perfect size and also easy to serve!

I found the recipe here on this site. They were so easy to pull together, and with no sugar added to the fruit, I think they’re a really healthy little dessert, well, maybe the ice cream added some fat and calories, but you can’t eat cobbler without ice cream!

Individual Berry Cobblers

Ingredients

NOTE: These directions are per each serving so multiply it by how many servings you plan to make.
½ cup berries or fruit of choice
2 tbsp oatmeal
1 tbsp all-purpose flour
1 tbsp brown sugar, slightly packed
1½ tbsp softened butter
pinch of salt
pinch of baking soda
a couple drops of vanilla

Instructions –
Preheat oven to 350 degrees
Place berries/fruit In a ramekin or other small baking dish
In a separate bowl, Mix all other ingredients….oatmeal, flour, sugar, butter, salt, baking soda, and vanilla. Use your hand or a fork to make sure all ingredients are incorporated well.
Sprinkle oatmeal mixture evenly over berries/fruit.
Place ramekin on a baking dish (just in case it boils over a little bit) and bake at 350 degrees for 25-30 minutes or until topping is beginning to brown.

Do you ever look at people’s You Tube videos of their food and wonder if they really eat? I mean, sometimes it’s more about the tableware and presentation than the food. To me, the most important part of mealtime is the food! We really enjoy our food over here and I want it to be delicious and pretty – not just pretty!

So, I’m going to close today by giving you a little look at my plates from this past week so you can see what we really ate.
Here’s a real look at our meals:

wp-1498945762059 — Grilled Marinated Steaks, Twice Baked Potatoes, Berry Green Salad

0622171822 — Perfect Pork Tostadas, Spanish Rice, Fresh Fruit

0526171712 — Turkey Burgers with Chipotle Yogurt Sauce, Corn on the cob, Oven Garlic Fries

0626171753 — Chicken Fajitas, Refried Beans, Lime tortilla chips, Cantaloupe

0625171328 — Turkey Breast, Mashed Potatoes, Asparagus and Berry Green Salad

I don’t just take pictures of pretty food – we eat real meals every day at home. Presentation is part of that, but also good food, prepared and cooked at home to nourish body and soul! Also the time at the table, sitting and talking as we eat, sip on glasses of tea, or nibble on sweet treats like this berry cobbler! Meal time is a huge part of family time. Let’s make dinner delicious, nourishing, pretty and memorable!

What have you made this week that your family loved?

From my country kitchen,

Discipleship · home · Marriage · Motherhood · Parenting · refreshment at home · Refreshment in marriage

Keeping Children On the Peripheral

June 29, 2017June 29, 2017 RefreshHer2 Comments

Many homes today put the children at the center of the home. Everything revolves around them, their wants, and their preferences. Of course when you have a baby in your home, you have no choice but to make them the center. But often we fail to allow them as they grow to move farther away from the center to the peripheral. Let me explain.

In the book, The Disciplines of the Home by Anne Ortlund, Anne makes a statement I had never heard, but totally agree with and have taught in principle:

“In the home, children should be on the peripheral.”

She goes on to say that if children are at the center, when they are removed, there is a huge gap in the husband/wife relationship. Do you think it’s remotely possible not to make your children the center of your home?
How does one go about not putting them in that place when they require so much time, attention and discipline?

Anne didn’t detail this point, but here are my thoughts –

The children shouldn’t dictate what is going to happen in your home. “I don’t want to go to Pizza Hut for supper! I want to eat at McDonald’s” It’s not that they can’t make the choice sometimes, but when Mom and Dad have made a decision, it should stick.
Mom and Dad need their own time. Children sleeping with their parents should be a rare occasion. Bedtimes give Mom and Dad an opportunity to talk, spend time together playing a game, or share a snack.
Parents need a date night. Don’t let the children’s cries keep you from leaving them occasionally. Let them know you’re going away to make a better home for them.
As the mom, recognize your husband’s needs and make sure you’re meeting those before doing extra things with/for your children. Are you always jumping up to do something for them, and don’t spend time just being with him?
Be sure you’re spending your recreational times together as a couple and not making it the norm for one parent to be running here with one child, and the other taking another child there. Be a family.

We all know that children have many needs – especially when they’re little, but the tendency is to keep allowing them to be needy and being the very center of the family’s circle where the parents ought to be.

Take a good look at the circle of your family; who’s in the middle and who’s on the peripheral? Does there need to be a change?

With love,

Discipleship · Encouragement · Family life · home · Motherhood · Parenting

Training Children To Sit and Participate in Church

June 28, 2017June 27, 2017 RefreshHer4 Comments

Children can do some really funny things in church. When I was teaching the five year-old Sunday school class I remember asking my students how we get to go to heaven. A little girl raised her hand confidently. Her answer?

Die.

That remembrance still makes me laugh!

Sometimes, though, the things children do in church aren’t so funny – especially if you’re the parent. I’m not sure if there’s anything more stressful or humiliating for a parent than trying to teach their little one to sit quietly anywhere, but especially at church. Your child gets fidgety and talkative just the time there’s a need for quiet, right? We’ve all been there, and I want to encourage you that there is hope!

I’ve blogged about this before, but I just felt the need to rehearse a few ideas about teaching your child to sit through a church service.

Train them. Talk to them before you leave home. Tell them what is going to happen when you get there. Remind them that you’re going so you can worship God and learn more about him!
- Will they be going to Sunday school? Remind them that you’ll be back to pick them up.
- Tell them what kind of behavior you expect from them while they’re in class.
- Will they go to Pastor’s Pals or up front to sing with the children? Prepare them for what you expect.
Fortify them. Feed them a nourishing breakfast to hold them over through the service time.
Equip them. Pack a bag to take to church. Keep it only for church times and fill it with quiet books, crayons, etc. that will help them to listen if they’re old enough. They could draw a picture of something pastor is talking about. If they’re older, they might have a special book to write down important words he hears in the message.
Help them. Don’t bring or give them sugary drinks or snacks – you’ll only be making it more impossible for them to sit still!
Reward them. I read about one mom who played the “Seat game.” After training her two children to sit quietly in church, their mom told them they could sit one row in front of the parents next week since they’d done so well. Each week that they obeyed and sat quietly and obediently, they all moved up one row. Eventually they were seated on rows two and three! You obviously couldn’t do this with really young children, but it would might be a great incentive for school-aged children.
Discipline them. If your child misbehaves, don’t wait for it to get better and stay in the service where they’re causing a ruckus! Take them out immediately and deal with it, and deal with it in a way that they won’t want it repeated. If they get to go out and run around the foyer, they’ll learn that this is more of a reward than a punishment!
Model for them. Encourage worship. By your example of engaging in the singing and worship, teach them to follow your lead! Sing! Pray! Open your Bible! Take notes!
Praise them. Be sure to review the service on the way home. Applaud their good behavior and obedience!
Warn them. Deal with the disobedience and use it as a teaching tool for the next service and warn them about what will take place if this happens again.

Training, training, training. This must be consistent and loving. It also really, really helps if you attend regularly. Sporadic attendance will lose any training! When this is every week, several times a week, they’ll get it!

This takes time, of course, but you probably won’t be getting called to their classroom nearly as often for behavior issues! Instead, the teacher will pull you aside to ask what you’re doing at home that’s made such a difference. Oh, she may also tell you about the hilarious thing your child said to her in class that day!

Stay at it! You will make it!

With love,

Christian love · Family life · home · Husband · joy · Love · Marriage · Motherhood · Women's roles

Ten Choices That Will Help Get Your Marriage to the Finish Line

June 16, 2017June 16, 2017 RefreshHer1 Comment

0427170702a Happy Friday y’all! I’m here today with a brand new post as we finish out this week talking about marriage. So far this week we’ve discussed roller coaster days, making more deposits in your relationship than withdrawals, and the high cost of foolish choices. Today I want to talk about wise choices and how they will effect your home.

Many women were so very grieved this week to hear of a well-loved Bible teacher announcing her divorce to her husband. Serious infidelity and substance abuse got a grip in her husband’s life, bringing their marriage to an end. I don’t know all the details, of course, but it has impacted the world with its sad ending. I’m afraid that some women will hear that, and then feel helpless themselves.

“If her marriage is falling apart, and she’s a famous Bible teacher, how can I ever hope to have a happy marriage?

When you consider the trials, the disagreements, the financial woes, the verbal misunderstandings, the pride, the emotions, the daily pressures, and the parenting conflicts, it’s a miracle that any marriage survives, but it can!

But how? I believe with all my heart it’s through the presence of the Lord and His guidance, His example of love, and the counsel of His Word that allows a Christian couple to remain together for a lifetime.

Satan wants to destroy our homes, but God is greater, friends! I’d like to share with you some choices we have to make to see our marriage to the Finish Line.

Stay on your knees in prayer for your mate and your marriage. Think about it – if you’re not praying for your husband, who is? Pray for ~
- His heart for God
- His purity
- His protection from Satan’s attacks
- A tender heart to sin
- A fear of God
- A desire for God’s house
- His leadership in your home – Note: Talk to the Lord about this – not him!
Keep the fun in your relationship. Don’t stop laughing, flirting, dancing in the grocery store aisle, or any of the things that made you smile when you were dating!
As your children grow up, release more and more of that attention they were getting and lavish it on your husband! A wife who makes her children the center of her attention even after they’re able to care for themselves is pushing her husband out of her life, and that is a dangerous action.
- Send the child back to their bed.
- Put them on a schedule and spend time with your husband.
- Leave them with a caregiver and go on dates.
- Be excited about your empty nest rather than crying on Facebook about how you miss your little boys! I know I’m stepping out on a limb on that one, but I love you, ladies, and someone needs to tell you to build a bridge and get over it.
- Don’t make your children the center of your world – make your husband the center. Doing so will give your children the security of parents who love each other and are going to stay together forever.
Keep the tenderness in your relationship.
- Use tender words, rather than angry, cross ones.
  - Make sure your conversation is more than about who’s picking up the gallon of milk.
- Use tender touches. Hold hands. Kiss goodbye and hello. You never know when that might be your last kiss. We’re not promised tomorrow!
Be first. To forgive. To serve. To love.
Be thoughtful. Pick up his favorite treat. Make a nourishing breakfast before he leaves. Ask what he would like for supper. Ask if there’s an errand you can do for him, or a way to lighten his load.
Do what he enjoys doing on his day off. I”m not much of a hiker, but I think my husband’s favorite date in recent years was a January birthday hike I planned, complete with a picnic lunch of homemade soup in Mason jars.. It was freezing cold and snowy., but we had so much fun!
Make plans for the days ahead. Doing so says, “I’m planning on spending all my life with you, and it’s going to be wonderful! What do you want to be like as you age? What trips could you dream about? What goals could you write down and look forward to as your lives change in the years ahead?
Don’t allow yourself to make excuses as to why you prefer to be slouchy at home. It is possible to be comfortable and look great for your husband. I’ve seen one too many videos of wives saying, “Yeah, my hair looks awful; I haven’t washed it in a week.” Really? Shampoo is cheap, and it doesn’t really take that long to get your hair cleaned. Men are visual – give him something great to look at!
Make a play list of all the love songs you listened to while dating. Let your hearts spin along with the music and remember where it all started between you both!

Because there is a God in heaven, there is hope for our marriages. Don’t let yourself feel in despair or like there is no chance that your marriage can be awesome! Which of these suggestions do you need to start on? Ask God to help you and see what a difference it can make in your home!

Refresh your marriage!